Always on Sunday by Susan Deitz on Creators.com

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Later Love DEAR SUSAN: My mom was in her late 50s when she found love again after divorcing my dad. She used an online dating site to find it — but this was before the site you mentioned existed. It seems a fine match, and they have been married for …Read more. A Perfect 10 DEAR SUSAN: I had to laugh at the letter from a man describing himself as a "Richard Gere" looking for a woman who is a professional, intelligent and a perfect 10. The problem might just be in his math! I've noticed that men rate …Read more. Choose Happiness DEAR SUSAN: This positive advice is for a fellow blogger, who seems to be having a hard time: It takes work to escape the comfort zone that keeps you making the same mistakes. (It's easier if you have the help of a good therapist, but people have …Read more. The Uninvited DEAR SUSAN: Your column on being left out of a couple's world has made me respond to an advice columnist for the first time in my life. The problem is much bigger than you seem to realize. When I was part of a couple, we did a lot of socializing. I …Read more.

Always on Sunday

DEAR SUSAN: I really enjoyed reading about the way you count your blessings on Sunday nights. As a 62-year-old single, I have boldly joined dating sites, but with little luck. I had a serious accident a while ago, and I guess my injuries have made me less desirable. But I felt grateful for your piece about counting our blessings. I was going to read it at Thanksgiving, but I realized that some of the people at the table were children or married couples, and it wouldn't have been appropriate. Could you rework the wording to make it into a piece appropriate for our Thanksgiving dinner, something on the order of a nondenominational prayer, because we all come from different religions? Thanks in advance. — From the "Single File" blog

DEAR BLOGGER: As honored as I am to be part of your family's future Thanksgiving, I must (gently) disagree with you on a major point. No age is exempted from the benefits of gratitude.

Two groups were tested in an experiment dealing with thankfulness. One was asked to keep a daily journal of events to be grateful for; the other group did not keep a journal. Results from the journal group proved the beneficial effects of consciously appreciating one's life.

According to The New York Times, "cultivating an 'attitude of gratitude' has been linked to better health, sounder sleep, less anxiety and depression, higher long-term satisfaction with life and kinder behavior toward others, including romantic partners."

Best of all, the act of silently appreciating (you fill in the blank) can get to be habitual, a daily event. Whether or not you actually start a written journal of gratitude, merely shifting your mindset can bring a glow to your life.

Thank the person who moves in the elevator to give you more room, your child when he brings home a model airplane he made in school, your beloved when she makes life more wonderful simply by being herself. When you turn the spotlight on your life, you'll probably forget the small spats and realize that it's all good.

Warning: This mental shift may prove contagious; gratitude has a delightful way of moving from smile to smile.

As for your dating life, I strongly urge you to use your interests as a guide to compatible people. There's a good chance they will also share your tastes and values. Certainly, the conversation is bound to be less strained and have a better chance of being a meeting of the minds.

SINGLISM AND MARITAL STATUS. If you are reading this, you are probably one of the 99.6 million Americans who are unmarried. I mention this number because you should know that you make up some 44 percent of the U.S. population. You are part of a powerful force — yet you face discrimination every day. You can change that by joining the 10,000 members of the Alternatives to Marriage Project, the unique organization that exists solely to advocate on your behalf.

AtMP is doing great work. I have given fundraisers in my home on its behalf and am constantly impressed by the quality of its members' work. See for yourself; check out the group's website (http://www.unmarried.org), and, if possible, contribute some of your time and money. This is a cause without a rebel, but it is without doubt a revolution. AtMP is the closest we can come right now to a representative in the halls of Congress, but the unmarried is a mushrooming population around the globe. Singleness is on the rise, on the vanguard of our population. Agreed, it is an uncomfortable place to be, but it is moving forward. In numbers and in acceptance, it is making inroads. This is the group that will lead the way.

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