Wake us if he did it with Hillary while Bill watched after they all had the early bird special at T.G.I. Friday's — and Obama's got the tapes.

Not that New York Gov. David Paterson's actual affairs don't sound titillating enough. But … they don't. They're the sexual equivalent of NyQuil — something kind of icky that just makes you yawn. A friend of mine saw the headlines about this latest "bombshell" yesterday, and her first thought was: "God, it must ...

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