Dear Jan: I just read your column "Don't Paint Nice Guys Invisible" and wanted to share my story with you.

Like many women, I grew up with a particular idea of male and female roles that made me attracted to all the wrong guys — irresponsible, at best; psychologically and verbally abusive, at worst. Three years ago, I met a man who was none of those things — he was kind, attractive, creative, intelligent and employed(!).

We dated very briefly, but his kindn ...

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