A mom going out shopping leaves a note for her teenage son: "Please make sure the door is fast, then dust the tables and trim the Christmas tree." She returns to find the door hinges glistening with oil, the tables covered with thicker dust and the tree pruned to half its original size.

Ah, the paradoxes of English! Even the simplest words can have two opposite meanings. "Fast" can mean "not moving" (stand fast) or "moving rapidly"; "dust&qu ...

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