LW#1 - Wake up and smell the coffee. Even if he's not gay, he's unfaithful, AND dishonest. You can't change him. Acknowledge that you've cared for him for this long, but then move on. If you want to maintain a platonic relationship with him, that's up to you, but look for romance elsewhere. Also, if you had sex with this guy, be sure to get tested for the standard STD's, including HIV. There's a good chance he may have been doing this before he went to college.

Regarding the boyfriend who refusing to stay at the GF's parents' house. There is a reason why he is feeling this way about staying with her folks. She needs to find out why. It might be something as simple as the air freshener/smells in the house. A family pet that is relentless...allergies of some sort, or is he getting the Third Degree when they are there? Are they making snide remarks about how she could do better? Does he have some sort of phobia? Find out WHY. If he can't come up with an answer, she needs to take a hard look at her relationship because this may just be selfishness on his part, and there are other selfish events she's been willing to overlook up to this point.

LW2, I certainly disagree with Kathy & Marcy about your boyfriend's stance, UNLESS Jay has explicitly said he expects things wouldn't change after marriage.

But for now, why SHOULD he sleep with you in a guest room at your parents' house now when his parents are just 2 miles away? When you're both in your everyday lives far away from your families, perhaps any problems regarding premarital sex is lessened in his mind, but if he's sleeping with you in your parents' house, that throws a spotlight onto the situation for his parents, your parents and himself -- major awkward.

Now think about this. You don't mention whether, in the 3 years you've been dating Jay, whether you've ever stayed with his parents. No? If it's because they've never invited you, perhaps it's because they want some time alone with their (unmarried, after all) son. In their situation, I would have, during those 3 years, arranged get-togethers at restaurants with you & your family, I would have invited you for meals and parties to our house, I would have suggested perhaps you & I go for lunch or go shopping or to a movie/play. But given your parents' home proximity, I'd have thought it a little silly to ask you to stay overnight if you & my son were not married.

LW1 - This time the ladies are 100% Right On! Your boyfiend is gay. Probably always has been. As they said, "The romance is over, honey".

Lost and Confused - Your boyfriend is gay. He is now just a boy friend!! More important - get tested for STDs and HIV. He may just be "testing the waters" but he put your health at stake. Move on.

Sleeping Alone, You may be living with your BF and planning to get married but you are not married. Perhaps your BFs parents are not comfortable with you and their son sleeping together in their house. Respect their feelings and sleep at your parent's house. Once you are married both sets of parents will be comfortable with you sleeping together.

Sleeping alone - You've got to be kidding. I am a sister, daughter, and a wife and when I was dating I would have never expected my boyfriend to stay at my parent's house if his parents live within a 30-45 min drive distance. You're not married; planning on getting married is vastly different than actually being married. If it were my brother/son I would expect to get to spend at least part of the holiday with him and only him. Occasional dinners at the significant other's home are ok, but I would not include the major holiday dinner/lunches unless both households have them at different times and you could make both. I would be greatly insulted if you bullied/guilted him into staying with your family and then my family would end up resenting you for it. You can switch back and forth after your married, but until then he's their son which is infinitely more meaningful than being your boyfriend.

Regarding LW1: While I think it's slightly premature to write off this guy as "gay" - discovering one's sexual identity is often a long process and many people experiment during their college years - I agree this girl should cut her losses and run. This man has cheated on her repeatedly and violated her trust.

I think you missed the mark on this one. I'm guessing that "Jay's" parents don't know they are co-habitating and would not approve, thus, the sleeping arrangements when they go home to Florida to visit. Jay doesn't want his parents to disapprove of his girlfriend or his lifestyle so he pretends they don't sleep together. I'm just guessing, but I'll bet that's what's going on here.