LW1 - For once, I am with the ladies: why exactly does LW want to tell his/her father this terrible secret? And what is this secret that makes it so terrible? That mom told LW that his dad is not really his dad? That something horrible happened to LW (molestation, rape, domestic abuse)? That LW is gay (not that this is anything terrible in my book, just one of the ways humans vary from each other)? LW should take his terrible secret to a therapist, not to his dying dad. If the reason is to make dad terrible in his final days, I would urge restraint. It's not going to make LW any better in the long run if dad suffers emotionally in addition to suffering physically, and it's going to make LW worse if dad doesn't give a rat's patootie about the secret. ___ LW2 - Just don't go to Sarah's parties. You can't make other people behave the way you want them to. Learn this lesson early. It's going to last you a lifetime. Sarah is, obviously, ignoring your wishes. Why in the world would you want to hang out with her? ___ LW3 - Yeah, when life hands you lemons, the best approach is to try to make lemonade. Or better yet - lemon bars or lemon meringue pie. :-) However, to go looking for a truckload of lemons you don't know what to do with is plain stupid. The LW today says that she had an *unplanned* baby and didn't want commitment and much support from the father, yet she managed to get an education and a career. Good for her! But is she really telling the previous LW, "Go ahead, honey, have that baby. It'll work out somehow. It worked out for me, so it'll work out for you"? For every woman who was a single teen mother and who managed to get a decent career, there are probably 20 out there who live in poverty, working minimum wage jobs just to keep their kids fed and clothed and who can't afford health insurance for their kids or themselves. Way to go.

Ariana--I agree with everything you said about all 3 letters. Why would LW1 even bother after all the years of abuse by such a tyrant of a father? I would have left and never looked back. LW2 I don't see why there is a problem, this person is not a friend, move on and be with people that share your interests. Things may have turned out wonderful for LW3 but that is rare. While she was working and getting her education, who raised her kid for her? She certainly could not have much time to do the mothering every child needs while she worked and went to college. While many of us find ourselves in a situation like that, it is crazy to enter into the situation willingly with eyes wide open.

It occurred to me that in re: to LW3 everyone seemed to be most concerned with what would be best for the unwed mother with little or no regard as to what would be best for the unborn child! There are way too many kids growing up in 1-parent homes these days-usually with the father being absent for the most part. Kids really do need to have a father and a mother! Give the child the best opportunity for a decent life and let him be adopted into a two-parent family! People need to stop being so selfish! Kids are not toys or property! They are helpless little children who deserve to be raised by two loving parents who are mature enough to take on the demands of caring for them. Why would you want to consign your child to a life of poverty and being left with strangers while you have to work and two or three low-paying jobs in order to make ends meet? Think about it!