Ethnically Speaking, March 29
by Larry Meeks
Dear Larry: Our teenage sons (ages 13 and 14) got into a fight with each other after a church-sponsored youth outing. According to adult witnesses, they were really going at it with each other. We have addressed their issue of fighting, and I know we need to deal with this problem somehow.
Their fighting at the church outing has created a real ethical dilemma for us. Another teen, about 17 years old, attempted to help one of the adults break up the fight. In the process, the 17-year-ol ...
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Posted by: BB
Comment: #1
Sat Mar 29, 2008 10:55 AM
Larry, I was just thinking before I opened your column that it should be called ethically speaking. You are absolutely right in your take on this. This parent should go to the other people, explain his dilemma and set up a payment plan. The 13 and 14 year olds should live a fairly sparse life with no extra goodies until this debt is paid off.
The parents would have felt betrayed if no adult had stepped in to stop this fight, especially with other people saying "they were really going at each other." That someone, even if only 17, was hurt is the consequence of his trying to stop their children from hurting each other.
There are consequences for our actions. These teenagers have made the consequences extend to their parents. It would do them good to see how the whole family has to work together to pay off this obligation. Whether the 17 year old came from a billionaire's family who put on airs and flew in jets to star's parties, he deserves to have his expenses paid. And pain and suffering. A broken bone is no fun.
I am the oldest of four kids from a family of cursing and screaming and parents fighting. We never acted up out in public and defended each other against the world. Our parents expected us to behave and it never occurred us not to. Maybe having to face the consequences will make these two teens more circumspect.
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Posted by: Laurie
Comment: #2
Sun Mar 30, 2008 11:40 AM
The family more than likely has insurance, please ask how much the insurance DID NOT pay for. Many people try to get money out of someone after the insurance has already paid and pocket the money.
If you do pay for the entire injury, the insurance company is entitled reimbursement for it's expenses, it's silly for you to have to cover what the insurance can cover.
Also, the Church event may also have insurance, all avenues should be investigated before you have to break yourself paying for all of this.
BB is also correct that your boys should be aware that they did indeed cause this problem and appropriate action on their part needs to be taken. But I think the 'pain and suffering' is ridiculous, the 17 year old should also realize that accidents can and will happen and getting in the middle of a fight is dangerous.
contact a lawyer and get some get suggestions.
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