The first question was just asked a week ago on Dear Prudence
http://www.slate.com/id/2232269/

You are right. I couldn't remember where I saw it. Now, I'm going to see if the advice is the same. The editors need to keep up with each other's columns.

Actually the law looks at engagement rings as part of a contract of marriage. If the contract is not fulfilled (by getting married) then the ring is to be returned.

I'd say return the ring, even if there's no law requiring one to do so. Let the baby have his bottle.

Ironically, Margo used to write the "Dear Prudence" column!

In the past, the ring was part of the contract for marriage and things were as Margo indicates: if the man breaks off the engagement, the ring stayed with the woman because she had given up other possible matches when she'd agreed to marry him. In other words, it was payment for the loss of time and other possible matches. It was usually the man who proposed and the woman who then rejected or accepted the proposal. If the man then reneged, the woman kept the ring. If the woman changed her mind, she returned the ring. In today's society, things are looked at differently much to my surprise. Just watch Judge Judy. If you followed Margo's advice and kept the ring, you could be in big legal trouble depending on which state you live in. So yes, the lw should return the ring. I"d give it directly to the mom since it's her ring. For all the lw knows, the ex could pawn or sell the ring and tell his mom he never got it back. In fact, I'd suggest the lw get a receipt when she returns the ring just in case. She may be sorry if she doesn't.