Lay the cards on the table before going out to dinner...good pun.

I take offense to her use of the word suckered. No one is suckering anyone. If you are too afraid to open your mouth to your own children than that is your fault. If you have been treating them for years they are just going with the normal flow of things. Keeping your mouth shut and complaining later makes YOU look like a fool and an idiot.

Cathy's right. Keeping your mouth shut and complaining later is typical passive-aggressive behaviour. Be kind but clear with people, otherwise if you're taken advantage of, it's YOUR fault.