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I have another complaint about restaurant seating practices. After having been disabled for several years after an incident that crushed my leg, I noticed that seating staff tend to put the disabled as far away from the entrance as possible. I have several times gotten lost in an unfamiliar restarant trying to keep up with the host while on crutches. It apparently never occurred to them that I could not follow them and really didn't want to. I continue to have the same problem with my elderly friends who use canes and walkers. Restaurant staff should be trained to have some consideration for the elderly and disabled. We are not high school track stars.

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Dear Larry Regarding your response to the co-habiting reader "Laura" whose boyfriend would not get married (dated 12 January), I'm not sure I agree entirely with your response. Sometimes ultimatums can back-fire. I'm sure the children would rather their daddy lives with them than be yet another single-parent family. I feel the reader is as concerned with her own status as "unmarried mother" as she is about the children - which is entirely understandable. The boyfriend is typical of most men in that he is getting all the benefits (and responsibility) of having a "wife" without actually having made the woman his wife. Rather than continue to put her boyfriend under stress and have him continue to dig his heels in against her, she should just drop the subject. Completely. He'll start to relax more in her company and look forward to coming home more if he knows he won't be put on the spot and have to make up excuses. She should carry on as normal, take up hobbies with and without her children (definitely without him), show him that she can live life quite well without him if she has to. She should also keep herself in good shape (old fashioned I know, but it works!), make an effort with her appearance, show him (subtly) that other men find her attractive. Nothing makes one more aware of what one has until someone else shows an interest. Above all, she should keep her attitude light, playful, caring, sexy even. Let him be reminded of what it was that made him fancy her in the first place. Not what he thinks she might become after marriage (controlling?) and how he might end up (trapped?). Hopefully, he'll come to the conclusion, under his own steam, that he doesn't want to lose her or his children. That he would be comfortable, proud, happy and relaxed to be a married man. M (from London, UK)

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Dear Larry I'm also from the Midwest. I waited tables while I attended college. Servers tend to have sections and alternate tables so that the distribution of customers is allocated fairly. I've never noticed customers grouped by race. As a parent I've noticed a tendency to group parents with children together. Tables without children are more likely to complain about sitting next to a noisy family. I think the tendency to group the disabled in the back is due to the fact that walkers and canes take up room in the areas between the tables. This makes it hard for customers and servers to walk between the tables. Mention your difficulty walking long distances when you are seated to better meet your personal needs. When my husband needed to use crutches temporarily we asked for a booth and he put his crutches by the wall so that they were out of the way. The gentleman did not mention if he was a smoker or non-smoker as well. The particular demographics of his area could dictate that whites smoke and African Americans do not. Or vice versa.