That's it. Tell little Miss Ohio that her parent's divorce is all about her and her feelings. How awful for her. Her father is a pig so she should certainly forgive and "move on" with their relationship. Her mother's entire world has been destroyed, so she doesn't need the comfort of family. It's all about a little pig of a 17 year old getting through the divorce. Good advice, ladies, good advice. And why the heck are we still being treated to further information on the trials of short people in restaurants? I'm at the point of reading this column to see what dreck people can get paid for writing. Although some of it, like the advice to the aunt of the illiterate girl, is criminally ignorant.

I don't normally agree with the advice of these ladies, which does tend to be pretty outdated and lacking. However, I can't quite agree with you either, Julia. Why is a 17 year old girl a pig for not wanting to know how to get through her father running off with another woman and her mother badmouthing him to her. Yes, her mother probably wants the comfort of family, but there is comfort and then there is venting on your child - which it sounds like mom is doing. 17 years-old is a very stressful time. Most kids are doing things like taking SATs and trying to figure out what they are going to do with their futures. I can't imagine what it must be like for someone to go through all that and an ugly divorce between her parents. Sorry, but I don't see how you can call this girl a 'little pig'. Wow.

Excuse me, Annie, but "you will forgive" the father who walked out on you without warning when you're a teenager, leaving you to deal with a mother who keeps venting to you???? Like bull! If my father did that to me, I would not automatically "forgive him." Even the passage of time won't necessarily make me "forgive him" - especially if he won't return my calls.

And "pig," Julia? That's really harsh and snotty judgment for someone going through this. It shows a real lack of compassion on your part to call a teenage girl whose father suddenly walked out on her, won't return her phone calls, and is the target of her mother's venting a "pig."

WOW! A little pig. How rude and unfeeling you are! The kid is 17 and life is hard as heck at that age. Add to the mix a cheater for a father that just totally abandoned his kid (won't even answer the phone or return calls) and a mom dumping all her problems on you. Mom should not be telling her probems to a 17 year old period no matter what it is. And this is serious. Sounds like the 17 year old is acting more maturely than either Mom and Dad.
As for the short people nonsense at restaurants. Yep I am sick of it. Just because you are short does not mean you automatically look young. It seems to me that some of these people purposely try to do so. It's not about the height. It's about the manner of your actions and the style of how you dress and hold yourself.

Whatever. You all agree that "Annie" gave terrible advice, which I have to admit elevated my irritation, but you have a great deal of compassion for a 17 year old who has none for her mother, who must be going through hell. At 17, you should be well on your way to relationships, work, and leaving home for further education. ALL of life is tough. At all stages, we can be brought to our knees. Yes, the mom needs to talk to someone (if she can afford it), and obviously her daughter is a poor choice for many reasons. Of course, we don't know if she's really venting or just commenting on her financial fears (No, I can't buy you a car because I'm not sure whether the bank will be taking the house). Another thing 17 won't like is that the gravy train may be grinding to a halt. Unless her next level of dealing with things will be playing one parent off another. Maybe like father, like daughter. Unless her letter was cruelly edited or she has a pathological inability to express herself, that was not the letter of a kind, working-toward-maturity person.

Wow, Julia, the amount of speculation and projection in your last post makes it seem pretty likely that you are thinking of someone else. Perhaps you are or have been related to a young person who fits your description much better than the letter writer? The letter writer didn't say anything about wanting money or abandoning her mother or running away from the situation. The only hint of selfishness was in the phrase "and have enough problems of my own," which is probably not entirely untrue, given everything. She, like her mother, just needs some mature help to get through this time, and she, perhaps unlike her mother, is asking for it. Yes, it seems the mother could use more family support -- from her family, from her siblings and her elders, not from her dependents.