Annie's Mailbox®, May 25
by Kathy Mitchell and Marcy Sugar
Dear Annie: I am in my early 20s and attending college. I recently found out that my mother had been having an off-and-on affair with a married man for years. Ever since, I have not been the same. I am angry, hurt, humiliated and confused.
My friends at school tell me that Mom is still the same person. She has always been a good mother to my sisters and me, but after hearing this news, I am devastated. I feel like I don't know her anymore. Part of her essence included her morals and et ...
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4 Comments | Post Comment
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Posted by: Jan
Comment: #1
Mon May 25, 2009 9:02 AM
Even though there is not a physical relationship between this married man and the intern there seems to be quite a strong emotional one. Perhaps it would be better to get more support from their individual spouses instead. I think a 100 text messages on a daily basis, plus several phone calls per week is way way too much. I don't blame this wife for being concerned.
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Posted by: BB
Comment: #2
Mon May 25, 2009 9:17 AM
The disappointed college student should contact student services and try to see a counselor or therapist to talk through her feelings about her mother. Or, she should talk to her minister or someone else who can help her work through her feelings. Having an on and again off again affair for years with a married man is far worse than being fallible and this young lady has a lot to think about. She has to understand that she may never feel the same way about her mother and that this is normal human behavior.
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Posted by: PuaHone
Comment: #3
Mon May 25, 2009 9:34 AM
I have a good friend who is having an affair. She is married. This is her second affair. It's hard for me to understand her behavior but I try to remember the good things about her - how she rushed to my side when my mother was dying in the hospital. Still, her behavior regarding the affair is disgusting to me. I can't imagine how hard it would be to find out that your mother was having a long-term affair with a married man. Yet will all have to accept that our parents are fallible human beings. I hope the LW receives the professional help that she needs to learn to accept and love her mother despite her extremely poor judgment that led her to become involved in an affair.
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Posted by: sarah stravinska
Comment: #4
Sun May 24, 2009 11:33 PM
My married boss was someone I liked so much. We told each other jokes as well as share work, but our relationship was always professional. He and his wife took me out to dinner and I loved her too. Now he is dead, and she and I are good friends.
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