Annie's Mailbox®, May 13
by Kathy Mitchell and Marcy Sugar
Dear Annie: I just finished my college degree. Getting the career I've always wanted is a hop, skip and jump away. I have amazing friends and a big family. But I feel so lost and alone. I was raped by a family member when I was 5, sexually assaulted as a young girl and raped again when I was 18. I was close to all these men. My father, the only man I ever trusted, died when I was a teenager, and my mother has never been a good role model.
My friends and family are aware of what I've be ...
( Back to Article )
Join the Discussion
|
4 Comments | Post Comment
|
Posted by: Pat
Comment: #1
Tue May 12, 2009 9:40 PM
lW2: I'm wondering if this guy is concerned about his gf's tipping because he's thinking of marrying her and he's worried she'll "tip" him into debt. :-)
LW3: Am I correct in thinking the lw's saying that the members of her coffee group were trying to outdo each other in regard to what was offered at these get-togethers? She said she was ousted; I guess that means her offerings weren't fancy enough. As the saying goes, "With friends like that, who needs enemies?" My aunt used to use that expression about one door closing and other opening. It certainly seems the case for the lw. She apparently met a better class of friends. Good for her. :)
|
Posted by: debbie hodge
Comment: #2
Wed May 13, 2009 5:08 AM
this is to john the mechanic. my husband has been a hairdresser for almost thirty years. He is self-employeed. He rents his booth and buys all his product. John does not rent his bay, he gets a salary whether he works or not. My husband is very grateful for every tip that a client gives him. If he doesn't have a client for one hour, he makes nothing. He stands on his feet 50 hours a week because he loves his profession and the tips are a wonderful thank you. debbie hodge, louisville, kentucky
|
Posted by: Claude
Comment: #3
Wed May 13, 2009 6:47 AM
LW1 Rape is a horrific crime and the consequences for the victims are deep and long lasting, even if they bury the pain for a while. This woman has my deepest sympathy. It sounds like she is ready to face her greatest challenge: get the proper help and work, work, WORK to put the abuse in perspective. DO NOT LET those criminal creeps ruin your life.
Building your own good life starts with difficult steps. I predict that you will do the work, and have a highly successful life and career. You will transform your pain into philosophy and action to help and give hope to others. You have lots of company. You will win!
|
Posted by: Jennifer Valdez
Comment: #4
Wed May 13, 2009 8:30 AM
Dear Finally Ready,
I once heard Buddhist teacher Jack Kornfield make the statement (and I paraphrase) that forgiveness is letting go of all hope for a better past. While I do not discount the agony you experienced - I have much of the same history - it may be time for you to re-create yourself in the present tense. To forgive others, and yourself, is not to put a stamp of approval on bad actions, but to commit to living in the here and now. The things you mention are a series of horrid events, not the definition of who you are. Try to find a counselor who focuses on your current situation, rather than one who endlessly digs around in past events - the past is gone (there's #1 for your gratitude list). You will never understand why others made the choices that affected you so deeply, and even if you knew, it wouldn't make you feel better.
|
|
|
|
|
 |
|
|
|
|
- 
- 
- 
