Recently
Love Is the Key to Successful Parenting
DR. WALLACE: I am a single parent of an 11-year-old daughter and a 13-year-old son. I had a lot of problems as a teen because my parents were super lenient in controlling me. Let's say I could do almost anything that I wanted with no questions asked.…Read more.
Give Intelligent Young Women a Break
DR. WALLACE: I'm angry that you encourage all girls, even the mentally, emotionally and physically mature young women who happen to be teenagers, not to get involved with older guys. You are dead wrong in your assumption that older guys and teenage …Read more.
Open and Honest Conversation Is Paramount
DR. WALLACE: Please tell me what to do. I'm 20, married three years and the mother of a 2-year-old son. I love my husband very much, but I'm lonely and depressed. My husband works 12 to 16 hours, 6 days a week. I have no friends, no job and no time …Read more.
My Friend's Mother Helps Her Cheat
DR. WALLACE: We have homework four days a week in world history. I do all my homework by myself, but my best friend's mother helps her with hers. I average a B on my homework, but my friend averages an A. I don't believe this is fair. Both of us are …Read more.
more articles
|
You Were Not a TattletaleDR. WALLACE: I think you made a huge mistake when you advised a 13-year-old girl to tell her parents about her 16-year-old sister, who was smoking marijuana and thinking about trying cocaine with her boyfriend. She was told by her parents to stop seeing this guy, but she was sneaking around and seeing him without her parents knowing about it. She told her younger sister everything, but made her promise she wouldn't tell her parents. You told her to break the promise, thus becoming a tattletale. Once I was a tattletale, and it brought me nothing but grief. When I was 16, I saw my stepfather sexually molesting my 14-year-old sister. When I told my mother, she said I was dreaming. She said it couldn't have happened. I then went down to the police station. To make a long, sad story short, our stepfather was arrested and wound up in prison. It seemed that he had molested other young children years before. When he was arrested, my mother blamed me, and from that moment on, she shut me out of her life. She treated me like I didn't exist. I am now 31 and haven't talked with my mother in 13 years. She refuses to talk to me. I am now sorry that I told the police about my stepfather. I lost a mother because I did. — Nameless, San Francisco. NAMELESS: I'm deeply sorry to hear about what you went through. Don't demean your own courageous actions by calling yourself a "tattletale." Sometimes doing the right thing comes with a high cost, but what if you hadn't acted? Your stepfather's sexual molestation would have continued and might have destroyed your younger sister's life.
You are a hero, but your mother just doesn't know it. She's still in denial and has chosen to blame you for the misdeeds of her husband, despite the evidence that convicted him. It is my hope that mom reads this column, comes to her senses and makes contact with you. Just as I would have advised you to take the action that you did, I stand firm in my answer to the girl whose older sister was flirting with dangerous drugs and hanging out with a predatory boyfriend. Her sister was headed for disaster, and your silence would have paved the way for a similar outcome in your situation. FBI IS INCREDIBLE CAREER DR. WALLACE: I read your column about the young lady wanting to be an FBI agent after college. Please encourage all young males and females with that desire to go to the website www.fbi.gov to discover FBI opportunities. I just graduated from an FBI Citizens Academy, and it is truly incredible the career one can have in the FBI. — John, Ponchatoula, La. JOHN: Thanks for the useful information. It will help many young adults make inquiries about serving in the FBI. Dr. Robert Wallace welcomes questions from readers. Although he is unable to reply to all of them individually, he will answer as many as possible in this column. E-mail him at rwallace@galesburg.net. To find out more about Dr. Robert Wallace and read features by other Creators Syndicate writers and cartoonists, visit the Creators Syndicate website at www.creators.com. COPYRIGHT 2010 CREATORS.COM
|
||||||||||||||||||||||||||
|
||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||
