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Love Is the Key to Successful Parenting
DR. WALLACE: I am a single parent of an 11-year-old daughter and a 13-year-old son. I had a lot of problems as a teen because my parents were super lenient in controlling me. Let's say I could do almost anything that I wanted with no questions asked.…Read more.
Give Intelligent Young Women a Break
DR. WALLACE: I'm angry that you encourage all girls, even the mentally, emotionally and physically mature young women who happen to be teenagers, not to get involved with older guys. You are dead wrong in your assumption that older guys and teenage …Read more.
Open and Honest Conversation Is Paramount
DR. WALLACE: Please tell me what to do. I'm 20, married three years and the mother of a 2-year-old son. I love my husband very much, but I'm lonely and depressed. My husband works 12 to 16 hours, 6 days a week. I have no friends, no job and no time …Read more.
My Friend's Mother Helps Her Cheat
DR. WALLACE: We have homework four days a week in world history. I do all my homework by myself, but my best friend's mother helps her with hers. I average a B on my homework, but my friend averages an A. I don't believe this is fair. Both of us are …Read more.
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Visit Your Parents Often, Then Attend CollegeDR. WALLACE: Four weeks ago, my boyfriend and I got married. We had been going together for over five years, so we decided that waiting longer was a waste of time. My husband, his brother and an uncle are part owners in an auto repair shop, and they all do very well financially. I have a full-time job as a salesperson in a store. I have never been happier in my life. I'm 19 and my husband is 21. My problem is that my parents did not want me to get married. My husband and I had a small church wedding, but my parents refused to attend. They are extremely upset that I am not planning to attend college and that my husband is, as they say, "an alley mechanic." Even though we live only 10 miles from my parents, I have not seen them since I got married. Everyone keeps telling me that "in time" my parents will accept the fact that I am married and will welcome us back into the family. But so far, all I have heard from them is silence. On the other side of the family, my husband's parents and relatives have been wonderful. Every night I pray that my parents will come to visit us, but my prayers have not been answered. I do love my parents and miss seeing them. What can I do to solve this dilemma? — Nameless, Monmouth, Ill. NAMELESS: Why wait for your parents to visit you? You and your husband should take the initiative and visit them. The time has come to reclaim your side of the family. Make visits to your parents a weekly habit. Eventually, their coolness will diminish. Is there any reason, by the way, for you not to attend college? If you have any interest in doing so, I'm sure such plans would hasten your parents' thaw. A good place to start would be to enroll at Carl Sandburg Community College in nearby Galesburg.
MY MOTHER SWEARS AT ME DR. WALLACE: I'm 14 and live alone with my mother. My parents are divorced, and my father has remarried and lives in Mexico. I love my mother, but I have a difficult time respecting her. Whenever I "disappoint" her, she becomes angry and swears at me. She uses some very nasty words. This really makes me feel bad. If she would ever apologize, then I wouldn't feel that she really means what she says. My mom is not a mean person. She is basically a good person, has many friends and never seems to explode at anyone but me. I look a lot like my father, and my mother hates my father. Do you think this might be the reason my mother unloads on me? My grandmother (Dad's mother) thinks that's the only reason she says bad things to me. She didn't act this way when my father was in our house. — Nameless, Brownsville, Texas NAMELESS: Your mother should take a course called "how to be a good and loving parent." Her behavior is deplorable. It appears that she's taking her frustrations about the divorce out on you. I doubt your looks have anything to do with her unacceptable behavior. Sometimes parents are unaware of the damage they do to their children with the language they use. Please make sure Mom reads your letter and my answer. It should cause her to re-evaluate her communication skills. Dr. Robert Wallace welcomes questions from readers. Although he is unable to reply to all of them individually, he will answer as many as possible in this column. E-mail him at rwallace@galesburg.net. To find out more about Dr. Robert Wallace and read features by other Creators Syndicate writers and cartoonists, visit the Creators Syndicate website at www.creators.com. COPYRIGHT 2010 CREATORS.COM
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