'Tween 12 and 20 by Dr. Robert Wallace

DR. WALLACE: My older brother started dating Shannon and their relationship became very serious. Shannon and I became good friends. Then for no apparent reason, my brother broke up with her. Needless to say, Shannon was crushed, but we remained close friends.

It took Shannon a long time to get over the hurt, but I did all I could to cheer her up. Finally, I fixed her up with my boyfriend's older brother. Before I knew what was happening, they were dating, and five months later they were engaged.

Well, the more involved Shannon got with her new boyfriend, the less attention she paid to me. I never do anything with her anymore because she is always with him. When I do see her, she barely says two words to me. It appears she is trying to avoid me. In fact, she didn't even tell me she was engaged. I heard it from my boyfriend.

I realize she has interests with her boyfriend, but so do I with my boyfriend. I don't believe that's a good enough reason to drop a friendship.

Personally, I'm not the least bit happy for her and I refuse to congratulate her. I can't think of anything I've done to destroy our friendship. Are my feelings and attitudes wrong? Why do you think she is treating me this way? — Jill, Hackensack, N.J.

JILL: It could be that Shannon can't avoid associating you with your brother now that she's found her true love, or thinks she has.

If true, this is totally unfair; you were an excellent friend to her, and I don't blame you for feeling upset. Nevertheless, two wrongs don't make a right. Congratulate her on her engagement and be pleasant around her. The friendship you had may just be in hiding right now, soon to be found.

GREEKS ENJOY SMOKING

DR.

WALLACE: I live in California and our state is tough on where smokers are permitted to light up. All government buildings, including public schools and universities, are smoke-free. Restaurants, bars, casinos and airports are now smoke-free. Even sporting events held outdoors ban smoking in the stands. There is a small smoking area away from the spectators.

Over summer vacation, our family traveled to Greece to visit my grandparents. My father is Greek and came to the United States with his uncle when he was 17. I loved Greece, the food and the people. Seeing the historic architecture and artifacts was very special for me. As you can tell, I'm proud of my Greek heritage. As you can also tell, I'm an anti-tobacco advocate.

Well, I almost went bonkers in Greece. Almost everybody, including all of my dad's relatives, smoked. Restaurants are so filled with smoke that I could hardly enjoy my roast lamb. Even shoppers in food markets were smoking while squeezing the tomatoes to see if they were ripe. My dad, who is an ex-smoker, says that smoking is a way of life for Greeks, and he seriously doubts if Greece will ever adopt California's anti-smoking policies. — Sophie, Gary, Ind.

SOPHIE: Sadly, your father's right. Smoking is as deeply ingrained in Greek society as baklava. Greece leads the world in per capita cigarette consumption.

Since California was a leader in banning smoking in public areas, many other states and local communities have passed strict no-smoking laws — and more are contemplating adoption of such laws.

Dr. Robert Wallace welcomes questions from readers. Although he is unable to reply to all of them individually, he will answer as many as possible in this column. E-mail him at rwallace@galesburg.net. To find out more about Dr. Robert Wallace and read features by other Creators Syndicate writers and cartoonists, visit the Creators Syndicate website at www.creators.com.

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