PARENTS: Are you strict or lenient when it comes to your teen smoking or not smoking?

A study by Dartmouth Medical School revealed some interesting findings on the influence of parents on whether their child does or does not smoke. Researchers surveyed 372 rural Vermont young people in grades four through 11 who had never smoked. Two years later, they were re-questioned about their parents' views on smoking, whether their friends smoked and whether they had started smoking.

Of those surveyed, 284 initially said their parents disapproved of their smoking and 19 percent became established smokers in the two years. By contrast, of the remaining young people who initially said their parents were lenient about smoking, 27 percent ended up becoming smokers.

The study showed that parents do play a big role in their children staying tobacco-free. Even parents who smoked, but who set nonsmoking expectations with their children, had just as much influence as parents who were tobacco-free.

While other research has shown that peer pressure has a major influence on a teen's behavior, this study, according to National Institute on Drug Abuse, also found that strong parental influence often overpowers peer pressure when it comes to smoking.

To summarize, teens, on the whole, listen and obey their parents when they deliver a strong clear message about smoking.

AGE TO START DATING SHOULD BE THE SAME

DR. WALLACE: I'm 16, and my brother is 17. He has been dating for more than a year and has dated several different girls. I'm not allowed to date until I'm 17 "when I will be able to control oversexed boys." I don't think this is fair. Do you? —Nameless, Lake Charles, La.

NAMELESS: I receive many, many letters such as yours from girls who have a more strict set of dating rules than their brothers. My answer is always the same. Those parents need to rethink this double standard when it concerns their sons' and daughters' dating regulations.

Parents have the duty to teach their children equally about all the responsibilities of dating and to instill equally high moral standards in regards to sexual behavior. And the age to commence dating should be the same for all teen siblings.

IS THIS GUY TOO OLD FOR ME?

DR. WALLACE: I'm 17 and met a 21-year-old guy at a graduation party. We really hit it off. He asked me for my phone number, and I gave it to him. Last night, he called and asked me out. I told him to call me back in a few days and I would give him an answer. I talked to my parents, and they said the guy was too old for me, and I couldn't go out with him.

Dr. Wallace, I read where males mature emotionally much later than females, so this 21-year-old guy and I should be on the same emotional level. Isn't this a good argument to get my parents to allow me to date this guy? —Dee, Boston, Mass.

DEE: Nice try! While boys lag behind girls both physically and emotionally for quite some time, the guys do catch up with the girls somewhere around the age of 17.

Dr. Robert Wallace welcomes questions from readers. Although he is unable to reply to all of them individually, he will answer as many as possible in this column. Email him at [email protected]. To find out more about Dr. Robert Wallace and read features by other Creators Syndicate writers and cartoonists, visit the Creators Syndicate website at www.creators.com.