Shame on You, Dr. Wallace! by Dr. Robert Wallace on Creators.com

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Love Is the Key to Successful Parenting DR. WALLACE: I am a single parent of an 11-year-old daughter and a 13-year-old son. I had a lot of problems as a teen because my parents were super lenient in controlling me. Let's say I could do almost anything that I wanted with no questions asked.…Read more. Give Intelligent Young Women a Break DR. WALLACE: I'm angry that you encourage all girls, even the mentally, emotionally and physically mature young women who happen to be teenagers, not to get involved with older guys. You are dead wrong in your assumption that older guys and teenage …Read more. Open and Honest Conversation Is Paramount DR. WALLACE: Please tell me what to do. I'm 20, married three years and the mother of a 2-year-old son. I love my husband very much, but I'm lonely and depressed. My husband works 12 to 16 hours, 6 days a week. I have no friends, no job and no time …Read more. My Friend's Mother Helps Her Cheat DR. WALLACE: We have homework four days a week in world history. I do all my homework by myself, but my best friend's mother helps her with hers. I average a B on my homework, but my friend averages an A. I don't believe this is fair. Both of us are …Read more.

Shame on You, Dr. Wallace!

DR. WALLACE: Morgan wrote to you complaining that after she got a steady baby-sitting job every Saturday night earning $20 a week, her parents stopped giving her a $7 per week allowance because she didn't need all that money. Morgan said that was unfair. I was totally shocked that you agreed with her.

Don't you know that you are teaching her to be a money-grabbing leech? I bet that when she becomes an adult she will go on welfare and get free money. You did this young girl a big disfavor. I sure hope her parents didn't take your advice.

I am a regular reader of your teen column and I almost always feel your advice is informative, caring and compassionate. Rarely do you stumble with your advice. This time, again you didn't stumble, you fell. Shame on you, Dr. Wallace! — Grandmother, Lake Charles, La.

GRANDMOTHER: Wow! I've had readers scold me for my advice, but in the many years of writing this teen column, you win the prize. Not only did you scold, you scalded! There are times after being scalded, I rethink my answer and I've been known to change it. But not this time. I still believe Morgan's parents should continue giving their daughter her allowance. If her allowance were to stop because she is baby-sitting, in essence, she would be punished for having a part-time job. A teen should never be punished for having honest employment. I don't see Morgan as a money-grabbing leech who will rely on society to support her as an adult.

I see her as a hardworking honorable member of society.

Even though we disagree on Morgan's dilemma, I appreciate you as a regular column reader. If everybody agreed with my comments, it would be a very dull column.

STOP ROBBING THE CRADLE

DR. WALLACE: You told a 19-year-old female that she was too old to be dating a 15-year-old boy. Shame on you. If the guy had been 19 and the girl had been 15, I'm sure you would have told him to go for it. I think your answer was sexist.

I'm 21 and my boyfriend happens to be all of 16, and we are a perfect couple. I graduated three years ago from high school and my guy is in the 11th grade. His mother and stepfather approve of our relationship. What do you think about that? — Nameless, Lincoln, Neb.

NAMELESS: I think this boy's mother and stepfather need to take a course in "Being a Wise Parent." Since the University of Nebraska is located in Lincoln, they might inquire if it offers such a course.

You're wrong. I would tell a 21-year-old guy the same thing I'm telling you. Stop robbing the cradle and find someone who has reached the age of consent. If you're wondering what that age is, it's 18.

Dr. Robert Wallace welcomes questions from readers. Although he is unable to reply to all of them individually, he will answer as many as possible in this column. E-mail him at rwallace@galesburg.net. To find out more about Dr. Robert Wallace and read features by other Creators Syndicate writers and cartoonists, visit the Creators Syndicate website at www.creators.com.

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4 Comments | Post Comment

Wallace, you should have also mentioned to the cradle robber that was she is doing with that 16 year old is probably illegal and it only takes one person to report their relationship and she goes to jail and has to be a registered sex offender the rest of her life. I can't imagine that boy is worth all that.

Comment: #1
Posted by: Diana
Thu Feb 18, 2010 6:58 PM

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Grandmother, I am glad you are no grandmother of mine. Hpw dare you say this hardworking young woman is a leech. You're ignorance is unbelievable and your arrogance is indefensible.

Comment: #2
Posted by: Val
Thu Feb 18, 2010 7:40 PM

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My parents stopped giving me an allowance when I got a job, but I was making more than $20 a week. Not really sure what the answer to that one is...I can see the argument from both sides.

Comment: #3
Posted by: Red
Fri Feb 19, 2010 8:17 PM

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for the parents who want to discontinue the allowance, I can't recall the original details, but it's the perfect time to make sure she's paying her expenses with her money and you could put the allowance in a savings account. If she ends up spending all of her money on her basic expenses, she's not going to learn any basic money management and there's no point in yanking away the allowance if you're not teaching her money management skills. I sure wish I had gotten an allowance and some money management skills, it would have made a world of difference in my adult life. Instead as a teen I learned to never spend any money in case I didn't have money later for something important and as an adult I began spending every dime I made after basic expenses because I had never been able to spend money before. Don't pull the allowance unless it's for a very good reason and any kid with any income should be taught basic money management.

Comment: #4
Posted by: Laurie
Sun Feb 21, 2010 4:48 PM

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Shame on You, Dr. Wallace!

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