Our Sons Are Sensible Social Drinkers by Dr. Robert Wallace on Creators.com

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Our Sons Are Sensible Social Drinkers

DR. WALLACE: Recently, the parents of a 17-year-old son were teaching him how to drink alcohol sensibly at home, so he wouldn't learn how to drink outside the home with his friends. You blew a gasket saying that they were doing their son a huge disfavor. Sir, may I tell you that you were 100 percent incorrect. If all parents would teach their teens to drink sensibly and to become responsible social drinkers, we would have fewer adult problem drinkers, which would mean fewer alcohol-related accidents, fewer alcoholics, fewer alcohol-related family problems and fewer alcohol-related crimes.

When teens don't learn how to drink sensibly with parental guidance, they learn from their peers and that can be troublesome. We have a set of fraternal twin sons. One is a high school teacher and coach and the other works for an insurance company. My wife and I introduced them to alcohol on their 16th birthday in our home. We started them on wine during supper once a week. On their 17th birthday, we introduced them to beer. They could have one beer every Saturday after doing their chores. On their 19th birthday, they were introduced to hard liquor mixed with a non-alcoholic liquid. They both seemed to enjoy a screwdriver — orange juice blended with a shot of vodka. Again, one was the limit and only on a Sunday, at home. At no time did my wife and I worry about our sons drinking foolishly when we were away from home. Both boys are college graduates, good citizens and sensible social drinkers. Isn't that what all parents want for their children? — Father, Cedar Lake, Ind.

FATHER: I strongly disagree with parents introducing alcohol to their children.

I believe they are making a serious mistake. Alcohol is a highly addictive drug that causes bouts of depression and has wreaked havoc on millions of American families. Instead of teaching your sons to drink, your wife and you would have done a better parenting job if you had stopped drinking completely yourselves and encouraged your sons to totally avoid alcohol. Isn't it possible that if you didn't teach your sons to drink, they might not be drinkers now?

SHOULD I WAIT TO LEARN ABOUT THE BIRDS AND BEES?

DR. WALLACE: I'm 13, and I want many answers to my questions about "the birds and the bees" (sex). I know that some mothers find it hard to discuss sexual matters with their daughters. I'm not sure how my mother stands on this issue. Should I wait a little longer to see if she approaches me on this subject, or should I approach her first? - Nameless, Elizabethtown, Ky.

NAMELESS: Approach Mom and tell her that you have some questions regarding sex and that you decided that she was the best person to ask. Chances are good that she will cooperate. If she stalls, ask her to recommend someone else to answer your questions regarding sex. This should stimulate her to listen to your questions and give honest answers.

Dr. Robert Wallace welcomes questions from readers. Although he is unable to reply to all of them individually, he will answer as many as possible in this column. Email him at rwallace@galesburg.net. To find out more about Dr. Robert Wallace and read features by other Creators Syndicate writers and cartoonists, visit the Creators Syndicate website at www.creators.com.

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2 Comments | Post Comment

Good lord Dr. Wallace, get off the soap box about alcohol. The LW is right.

1) Alcohol is NOT addictive. A chemical dependency can form, but generally follows addiction, not triggering it. People hooked on alcohol, like those hooked on shopping, gambling, or video games, have a psychological dependency.

2) Other cultures take a much more blase approach to drinking, with good results. Take the stereotypical European parents allowing wine at dinner, etc. Alcohol is not the root of evil.

I'm on the side that thinks parents do their children a service by teaching them responsible, limited drinking. It's the parents that forbid it outright that can find themselves with binge drinkers on their hands.

Comment: #1
Posted by: Jers
Wed Jan 18, 2012 4:07 PM

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LW1 is naive if he thinks those were the only drinks his boys were drinking. He is not counting the drinking they did on their own or with friends.

Jers Idon't know how long its been since you were a teenager. They drink like fishes. Regardless of what their parents teach them.

Comment: #2
Posted by: capiscan
Mon Jan 23, 2012 11:00 AM

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'Tween 12 and 20 by Dr. Robert Wallace

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Our Sons Are Sensible Social Drinkers

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