'Tween 12 and 20 by Dr. Robert Wallace

DR. WALLACE: Soon I'm going to take an IQ test. I know it measures a person's intelligence and a score over 100 is supposed to be good. Is there anything else you can tell me regarding this test? — Jody, Fresno, Calif.

JODY: IQ (intelligence quotient) tests attempt to measure learning capacity.

Things like reading comprehension, vocabulary skills and even social interactions are tabulated. The average IQ score is said to be 100, which means the number of people who score 99 and below on the test is expected to be roughly the same as the number who score 101 and above. Some people feel this is a controversial test.

Because IQ tests are fallible — documented problems such as cultural bias throw their accuracy into question — some schools do not administer them. Furthermore, a test taker's state of physical or emotional health the day of the test may also skew the result significantly.

TEEN'S BOYFRIEND WANTS TO DATE MULTIPLE GIRLS

DR. WALLACE: I'm dating Gary who continues seeing another girl even though I have asked him to stop seeing her. He always says that we're not engaged and he can see anyone else he pleases.

He has encouraged me to date other guys when he is with Beth, but I don't want to. I care a lot about this guy and want him all for myself. We have great times when we're together. What can I do to make me his one and only? I feel terrible sitting at home alone when he's out with another girl. — Nameless, Michigan City, Ind.

NAMELESS: Gary has been honest and has given you a choice: You can either accept the fact that he's dating another young woman or you can end the relationship. For whatever reason, he has no wish to be in a steady relationship with only one female right now.

I urge you not to sit home alone when he's out with Beth. That's a sure recipe for unhappiness and frustration. Go out — if not with other guys, then with your friends. The best, or perhaps only, way to change someone else's behavior is to alter your own. I guarantee that Mr. Right is still out there waiting for you, and his name is not Gary.

CRIMINAL BEHAVIOR IS NOT GENETIC

DR. WALLACE: I'm 19 and so is my boyfriend. He is finishing his first year in college and I'm working full time as a checker in a supermarket. We've been together for over two years, and there is a good possibility we will someday be husband and wife.

Five years ago, his father and his father's best friend were convicted of a crime. His father spent 22 months behind bars, while his friend was incarcerated for 30 months.

I know this is probably a stupid question, but I'd really like you to answer it. Is crime an inherited trait? If we did get married, could our children be at risk? — Nameless, Kerrville, Texas.

NAMELESS: No. There's nothing genetic about criminal behavior. Crime is an individual moral choice, but can be fostered in an abusive, dysfunctional family environment. If the two of you are loving and supportive parents, your children will grow up to be good citizens.

By the way, there's no such thing as a "stupid" question. I respect every question a teen asks.

Dr. Robert Wallace welcomes questions from readers. Although he is unable to reply to all of them individually, he will answer as many as possible in this column. E-mail him at rwallace@galesburg.net. To find out more about Dr. Robert Wallace and read features by other Creators Syndicate writers and cartoonists, visit the Creators Syndicate website at www.creators.com.

COPYRIGHT 2008 CREATORS SYNDICATE INC.

TWEEN 12 & 20

BY DR. ROBERT WALLACE

RELEASE TUESDAY, DECEMBER 9, 2008, AND THEREAFTER

Pets can be a Great Addition to the Family

DR. WALLACE: I'm 12 and live with my mother and father. I'd like to have a pet. My parents will say yes, if you answer my letter saying that I should have one. Please answer my letter. I'd like a dog or a cat. — Heidi, McComb, Miss.

HEIDI: Yes, Yes, Yes!

Pet ownership is a marvelous experience. As far as I'm concerned, every family should have a pet, as long as circumstances permit. But, remember, having a pet brings great responsibility. It will need love and plenty of care; it should never be neglected.

An excellent starting point for finding a pet is your local animal shelter, where you will find a loving and loyal pet that will be a wonderful addition to your family.

TEEN SHOULDN'T DESERT FRIEND FOR A CUTE BOY

DR. WALLACE: Hannah and I have been best friends since third grade. When we're together alone or with other girls, she is a loyal friend, but all of that ends whenever a boy comes on the scene.

Let me give you an example. If Hannah and I are out together and any two guys stop and talk, she forgets all about me and starts talking to the cutest guy. Several times she and a guy will take off together, leaving me stranded with a guy I don't know and don't want to know.

I've tried reasoning with her. She always says she won't ever do it again, but she always does. What can I do to get Hannah to understand that best friends don't desert one another just because a cute guy comes along? — Taylor, Austin, Texas.

TAYLOR: It's time to take action. Ask Hannah to come over to your house and, after feeding her a favorite snack, inform her that the next time she deserts you for a boy it will be her last time. Make sure she knows you really enjoy her company and relish being her best friend, but you're tired of being left stranded with a guy you don't know. Enough is enough.

PURSUE COLLEGE DEGREE TO DEVELOP KNOWLEDGE

DR. WALLACE: I was married when I was 17. My husband was 27. I am now 20. We have a 3-year-old daughter and a solid, loving marriage. My husband is a college graduate and has a good job working for an insurance company. We're not rich, but money is not an issue.

I quit high school during my senior year to get married. I have since taken night courses and have earned my high school diploma. I have always enjoyed school and would like to start taking courses at a community college. I'd like some day to be a college graduate.

My husband thinks this would be a waste of time because he earns sufficient money to support our family, but he would support me 100 percent if I do decide to start college. I would appreciate your thoughts. — Melissa, Garden Grove, Calif.

MELISSA: By all means, pursue that college degree. This isn't about you as a wage earner, but you as a human being. The pursuit of knowledge will benefit you — and your husband — in incalculable and unforeseeable ways, simply by broadening your awareness of this complex world. It will help you achieve your potential as a mother, wife and citizen.

Good things happen when you open your mind to the educational process. And I am pleased to hear your husband loves you enough to support your endeavor 100 percent.

Dr. Robert Wallace welcomes questions from readers. Although he is unable to reply to all of them individually, he will answer as many as possible in this column. E-mail him at rwallace@galesburg.net. To find out more about Dr. Robert Wallace and read features by other Creators Syndicate writers and cartoonists, visit the Creators Syndicate website at www.creators.com.

COPYRIGHT 2008 CREATORS SYNDICATE INC.

TWEEN 12 & 20

BY DR. ROBERT WALLACE

RELEASE WEDNESDAY, DECEMBER 10, 2008, AND THEREAFTER

Writer Needs to Stop Using Highly Addictive Crack and Pure Cocaine

DR. WALLACE: You told a guy that crack cocaine was much more potent than pure cocaine. I challenge these words. I have used both and they give the identical high. Cocaine is cocaine! It doesn't make any difference if it's crack or if it's pure. Get your facts straight before you try to influence your young readers. It might be good if you would try both crack and pure cocaine so that you might give a correct answer on the potency of both types. — Nameless, Las Vegas.

NAMELESS: Don't hold your breath until I give you the results of a self-cocaine use test to determine which one is more potent.

I receive my information on a myriad of drug issues from professionals such as Dr. Arnold Washton, a drug-abuse specialist with Helpline and Regent Hospital in New York City. Washton says that crack cocaine is 5 to 10 times more dangerous and addictive than pure cocaine — which is still an extremely dangerous and addictive drug.

Crack is so potent, Washton warns, that it can hook a user and take over his personality, sometimes after only one use.

What makes crack so deadly is its instantly potent effect. Unlike regular cocaine, crack — which resembles whitish or light brown chips of soap — is usually smoked in a pipe. Within seconds after smoking, a high level of the cocaine enters the bloodstream and severely alters the brain's chemistry. Ultimately, the drug can cause everything from extreme paranoia to heart attacks, brain seizures and death.

Can you stop using crack completely? I sure hope so. If you can, stop! Then also stop using pure cocaine. Your body and your wallet will thank you.

TEEN SHOULD BE ABLE TO ATTEND THE SCHOOL DANCE

DR. WALLACE: I'm a girl in the eighth grade and our school is having its first after-school dance in a couple of weeks. My friends and I are excited and looking forward to a really fun time.

Last night, my parents told me I won't be attending our holiday dance because I got a B on my report card. I don't think this is fair because they never told me that when my report card came in. They were disappointed because this was the first B I ever received, but I know that I will probably receive other B's before I graduate from college.

Maybe there is nothing you can say or do to make my parents change their minds, but I still want to know if you think they were fair with this punishment. The B was in physical education because I'm not too coordinated.

Both of my parents are Korean and grades mean a lot to them. — Soo, Seattle.

SOO: I agree with you. Mom and Dad seriously overreacted. You should have received high praise for your total excellent academic achievement, not punishment for one B.

As an educator, I'm convinced that letter grades are given to appease the parents, not to show the true achievement of the students.

Let's face it — grades are highly subjective. When I was working on my doctor's degree in education, I did research on the grading system in public high schools. I once asked four English teachers to grade the same two-page theme on teen pregnancy. One teacher gave it an A, two gave it a B and the fourth gave it a C+. Enough said!

Dr. Robert Wallace welcomes questions from readers. Although he is unable to reply to all of them individually, he will answer as many as possible in this column. E-mail him at rwallace@galesburg.net. To find out more about Dr. Robert Wallace and read features by other Creators Syndicate writers and cartoonists, visit the Creators Syndicate website at www.creators.com.

COPYRIGHT 2008 CREATORS SYNDICATE INC.

TWEEN 12 & 20

BY DR. ROBERT WALLACE

RELEASE THURSDAY, DECEMBER 11, 2008, AND THEREAFTER

Don't Let Jealous Boyfriend End Pen Pal Relationship

DR. WALLACE: Richard and I have been dating steadily for six months. He's a great guy and we have fun times when we're together.

Yesterday, he was at my house when I went to our mailbox. He walked with me. On the way back, he noticed a letter that was addressed to me. It was a letter from Peter in St. Catharines, Ontario, Canada, who has been my pen pal for over two years; we write to each other about once a month.

Peter and I are great friends. I'd like to meet him some day, but there is no possibility of romance between us. He has a steady girlfriend and they both attend a university in Toronto. He knows that I'm going with Richard and is happy that I have a great boyfriend.

I didn't tell Richard that I have a Canadian pen pal because I didn't think it was necessary. I've known Peter four times longer than I've known Richard. To make a long story short, Richard wants me to tell Peter that the time has come to end the pen pal relationship. I disagree with him 100 percent. We both agreed to let you be the arbitrator and will agree with your decision. Lay it on us. — Pam, Ft. Walton Beach, Fla.

PAM: Somehow I get the feeling it was your idea to allow me to make this decision because you knew I'd agree with you — and I do. First of all, this is not Richard's call. He has no business presuming he can regulate your life, nor is it healthy to allow jealousy to have such a loud voice in your relationship.

Beyond all this, I must add that having a pen pal is a wonderful experience. Some pen pals correspond for a lifetime. Maybe the next time you write Peter, you could ask him to find a pal for Richard.

MOTHER ENCOURAGES TEEN TO LEAVE ABUSIVE BOYFRIEND

DR. WALLACE: This letter is for the girl in El Paso, Texas, (my home, too) who was being physically abused by the boyfriend she thought she loved. Your advice was correct, but I'd also like to address a few words of advice to her.

Young lady, no one ever deserves abuse of any kind. I'm not so sure you actually love this guy. It's highly possible that you are insecure and are afraid to just walk away and start over. Every time you are abused physically, he also abuses your self-esteem; that is exactly the way he wants you — feeling bad about yourself. A battered self-esteem can only be mended when the physical abuse ends.

I know! I married my high school sweetheart, even after he had physically abused me, thinking he would change. I divorced him after 10 years of abuse. Since that day of freedom, I've raised two daughters while working full time and attending college at night. It's been 11 years since I took matters into my own hands and I feel great! My girls are well-adjusted, loving mothers — they both married men who love and stand by them rather than on them.

Young lady, I urge you to believe in yourself and get away from him now. He won't change, but you will, and when you reflect back, you'll wonder what took you so long. — Mother, El Paso, Texas.

MOTHER: Thanks for sharing your story and giving encouragement to someone who needs all the support she can get. And congratulations to you for making the courageous decision to leave an abusive marriage, thereby breaking the cycle of abuse, so your daughters didn't wind up with low self-esteem as a legacy.

Dr. Robert Wallace welcomes questions from readers. Although he is unable to reply to all of them individually, he will answer as many as possible in this column. E-mail him at rwallace@galesburg.net. To find out more about Dr. Robert Wallace and read features by other Creators Syndicate writers and cartoonists, visit the Creators Syndicate website at www.creators.com.

COPYRIGHT 2008 CREATORS SYNDICATE INC.

TWEEN 12 & 20

BY DR. ROBERT WALLACE

RELEASE FRIDAY, DECEMBER 12, 2008, AND THEREAFTER

Teen Should Resist Peer Pressure to Drink Alcohol at Parties

DR. WALLACE: I'm 17 and basically a good kid. I get above-average grades and plan to attend college. Eventually, I want to study law and become an attorney. I'm not wild, but I'm also not a prude. I will never do drugs, but I'm tempted to try a small amount of alcohol. I know I'd never get drunk, but at parties there are times when I feel like a ninny when someone offers me a drink and I respond, "Thanks, but I don't drink."

Both of my parents are social drinkers. I have never seen either one of them drunk and I never will. My mother drinks wine and my dad has beer; they only drink on special occasions, including parties. I have never seen them having alcohol by themselves at home.

I know I'll consume some alcohol when I'm an adult. I'd like to start now so I'll know what to expect when I'm invited to my first cocktail party. Do you see anything wrong with this? — Nameless, Goshen, Ind.

NAMELESS: I personally feel that the world would be a much better place if it were void of alcohol. Some people can control how much they drink, but most can't.

Don't get caught up in peer pressure. You are not a ninny when you tell someone you don't drink. In fact, it shows you have courage, independence and good sense. Please read the following letter. It just might convince you to forego that first drink.

DR. WALLACE: I'm a 16-year-old girl who didn't drink until I went to my first un-chaperoned party where booze was fashionable. I'd like to share my experience with my fellow teens.

When my girlfriend and I arrived at the party, we were both astonished at the amount of booze — wine, beer, whiskey — that was available, and it was all free. In fact, we were encouraged to "join in the fun." I started out sipping a beer, but was talked into trying something with a little more kick. It turned out that I was drinking a whiskey and cola.

I remember telling myself to slow down, but I was starting to get that long-awaited buzz and wanted to experience it to the fullest. About 20 minutes later, I started feeling ill. I made it to the bathroom and started throwing up. I was so sick that I was afraid of dying, but hoping that I would. I then passed out on the bathroom floor.

I was fortunate that my friend missed me at the party and started looking for me. She drove me to her house and put me to bed. She then called my parents and told them I wasn't feeling well and had fallen asleep on her couch and her mother had put me to bed. My friend, in fact, probably saved me from a lot of parental disappointment, because my father is the youth pastor in our church.

The next morning I had a hangover as large as the Montana sky, but I took a shower and went to school with clothes borrowed from my friend. My parents never did find out about my "one and only" misadventure with alcohol. They would have punished me and made me promise that I would never again do something so stupid.

But experience was my best teacher. I promised myself that my first experience with alcohol would also be my last. I knew that alcohol was a very potent liquid, but I was not aware how dangerously powerful it really is. I wanted to find out for myself what booze was all about. Now I know! — Bethany, Battle Creek, Mich.

BETHANY: Experience is the master teacher.

Dr. Robert Wallace welcomes questions from readers. Although he is unable to reply to all of them individually, he will answer as many as possible in this column. E-mail him at rwallace@galesburg.net. To find out more about Dr. Robert Wallace and read features by other Creators Syndicate writers and cartoonists, visit the Creators Syndicate website at www.creators.com.

COPYRIGHT 2008 CREATORS SYNDICATE INC.

TWEEN 12 & 20

BY DR. ROBERT WALLACE

RELEASE SATURDAY, DECEMBER 13, 2008, AND THEREAFTER

Female Teens Should Avoid Being Pen Pals with Male Prisoners

DR. WALLACE: My best friend's brother is in prison for armed robbery. He received a four-year sentence and has three and a half more years to serve. I know this fellow. When my friend asked me to write to him because he is lonely, I said I would. But instead of hearing back from my friend's brother, I received a letter from another convict who is a friend of my friend's brother. He said that he is also lonely and wanted to start a pen pal relationship with me.

I'd like to do this because lonely people need a friend, but my parents are refusing to allow me to correspond with this guy. They say a 17-year-old girl should not be writing to someone in prison.

Please give me your opinion on this matter. I'm sure that you will be on my side. If you are, that will persuade my mom to let me be a lonely guy's pen pal. — Nameless, Sycamore, Ill.

NAMELESS: I'm sorry to disappoint you, but I'm not in favor of teens corresponding with prison inmates. Some time ago a correctional officer addressed this issue. The following letter is from him and he spells out some sobering facts.

DR. WALLACE: This letter is in response to the teenage girl who wanted to correspond with a prison inmate. I am a correctional officer at a level four maximum-security prison in Michigan City, Ind., where over 1,800 inmates are housed.

I have seen what happens when most convicts get pen pals. They tell their pen pals what they want them to hear. Once they get the female pal hooked on the letters, then they encourage her to visit them. After the visits often come requests for money. Some convicts are married with as many as four "pen pal" girlfriends. I've heard prisoners tell visitors every line in the book. I have also observed some inmates having three visits in a day with three different females.

These guys behind bars are criminals. On the streets they were child molesters, rapists and murderers. I've been employed by the Department of Corrections for many years and I know what I am talking about. — Correctional Officer, Michigan City, Ind.

I responded to the officer's letter by thanking him for his frank response regarding teens being pen pals with prison inmates. While not all people behind bars fall into the category he describes, the danger of being taken advantage of is great. It isn't worth the risk for a teenage girl to be a pen pal with a convict.

Many religious organizations encourage adult members to correspond with prisoners. I feel this is a much better method of cheering up lonely prisoners.

JAPANESE STUDENTS SPEND MORE TIME IN SCHOOL THAN AMERICANS

DR. WALLACE: Our teacher keeps telling us that students in Japan are much smarter than we are. If this is true, why are they so smart? Could it be their diet? My parents think so. — Pam, Clifton, N.J.

PAM: Students in Japan have, on the whole, better study habits than our students, mainly because the families in Japan place a greater emphasis on education. Add to this the fact that students in Japan spend 60 more days per year in school than we do.

This doesn't mean the Japanese students are "smarter," but it does mean they spend more time on learning.

Dr. Robert Wallace welcomes questions from readers. Although he is unable to reply to all of them individually, he will answer as many as possible in this column. E-mail him at rwallace@galesburg.net. To find out more about Dr. Robert Wallace and read features by other Creators Syndicate writers and cartoonists, visit the Creators Syndicate website at www.creators.com.

COPYRIGHT 2008 CREATORS SYNDICATE INC.