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Love Is the Key to Successful Parenting
DR. WALLACE: I am a single parent of an 11-year-old daughter and a 13-year-old son. I had a lot of problems as a teen because my parents were super lenient in controlling me. Let's say I could do almost anything that I wanted with no questions asked.…Read more.
Give Intelligent Young Women a Break
DR. WALLACE: I'm angry that you encourage all girls, even the mentally, emotionally and physically mature young women who happen to be teenagers, not to get involved with older guys. You are dead wrong in your assumption that older guys and teenage …Read more.
Open and Honest Conversation Is Paramount
DR. WALLACE: Please tell me what to do. I'm 20, married three years and the mother of a 2-year-old son. I love my husband very much, but I'm lonely and depressed. My husband works 12 to 16 hours, 6 days a week. I have no friends, no job and no time …Read more.
My Friend's Mother Helps Her Cheat
DR. WALLACE: We have homework four days a week in world history. I do all my homework by myself, but my best friend's mother helps her with hers. I average a B on my homework, but my friend averages an A. I don't believe this is fair. Both of us are …Read more.
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I Met my Husband When I was 14 and He was 19DR. WALLACE: I'm writing regarding your answer to Richard from Beaumont, Texas, who was 19 and wanted to date a girl who was 14. Richard's parents approved of the arrangement, but the girl's mother said no. You told Richard to honor the girl's mother's request and to confine his search for a date to girls who were at least 17. I don't think your answer to Richard should apply to every 19-year-old guy, especially when you encourage him to look for older girls. Since Richard's parents approved of this relationship, I feel the girl's mother should at least compromise and allow supervised dates and home visits until she really got to know him. I met my husband when I was 14 and he was 19. I lived with my grandmother and she was also concerned about the age difference, but once she got to know him, she fell in love with him and encouraged us to stay together. We did. We were married when I was 18 and he was 23. We have been married 39 happy years. When we first met, I was a physically and mentally mature 14-year-old and he was a sensible 19-year-old. — Greta, Madison, Wis. GRETA: You are living proof that a 19-14 relationship can succeed. But I will continue to encourage the much older teen (usually a guy) to seek someone closer to his own age. In this case, the girl's mother did not want her daughter dating someone who was 19, and that put an end to our debate as far as I am concerned. PARENTS MUST GIVE UNCONDITIONAL LOVE DR.
I read your column regularly and appreciate your handling of difficult teen problems. I'm the mother of three teenage daughters and would be thrilled if you could help me become a better parent. In a sentence or two, please give me guidance on the most important duty a parent can perform — to be the best possible mother or father. I do realize that there are many duties, but I want only what you think is paramount. — Mother, Moncton, New Brunswick. MOTHER: Children of all ages must know they have their parents' unconditional love. Love is the foundation of emotional health. Without it, children will lack grounding in life and feel abandoned. Unless they are able to compensate and find unconditional love elsewhere, they are sure to have serious emotional problems, including an inability to relate to others. Many parents say they love their children. However, when children are asked if they FEEL loved, they often say no. Parents, please love your children, not for how well they perform but simply for who they are. And when you're with them, give them the best of who you are. Dr. Robert Wallace welcomes questions from readers. Although he is unable to reply to all of them individually, he will answer as many as possible in this column. E-mail him at rwallace@galesburg.net. To find out more about Dr. Robert Wallace and read features by other Creators Syndicate writers and cartoonists, visit the Creators Syndicate website at www.creators.com. COPYRIGHT 2010 CREATORS.COM
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