creators home
creators.com lifestyle web

Recently

My Friend's Mother Helps Her Cheat DR. WALLACE: We have homework four days a week in world history. I do all my homework by myself, but my best friend's mother helps her with hers. I average a B on my homework, but my friend averages an A. I don't believe this is fair. Both of us are …Read more. Cousins Don't Normally Date Each Other DR. WALLACE: The End of Semester Fling is the biggest dance party and school-sponsored event at our school. Even the teachers and administrators show up and have fun. Most students attend the Fling as couples, but those not dating can show up as a …Read more. I Feel Abandoned and Alone DR. WALLACE: I'm 17 and about as sad and depressed as a teen can be. My boyfriend left me for another girl. I loved Jeremy more than any human on earth. He was my life. I went out of town during the Christmas break. My parents and I spent the …Read more. Please Tell Me How to be Happy DR. WALLACE: I'm 14 and down on myself. I feel like all the girls at my school are prettier and smarter than I am. I know they have more money to spend than I do, and they always wear nicer clothes than I have. When it comes to dating, I don't think …Read more.
more articles

Gay Teen Pleads for Acceptance

Share Comment

DR. WALLACE: I'm a 17-year-old guy and I'm gay. Being gay, I am aware that gay guys have the highest suicide percentage of all teens. The reason why is that we are ostracized by mainstream heterosexual America. We are ridiculed, hated, despised and persecuted. No wonder we can't find comfort and peace in this godless world. Suicide has crossed my mind several times, but my faith in God made me realize that God gives life and only God can take away a life.

Teens, if you know someone who is gay, reach out and be kind to this person. Show compassion, understanding and acceptance as an equal. We didn't choose to be gay. That's just the way we entered the world.

My family was horrified when I told them I was gay. They had no idea I was because I didn't want them to know. It's been six months since I gave them the startling news. They have accepted my gayness, but I can tell they are very disappointed. I'm not a gay rights activist and I don't flaunt my sexuality by dressing like a transvestite and dancing in parades.

I consider myself a normal teen that enjoys sports, music, animals and watching a good television program. I have two arms and two legs, a neck and a head, hands and feet, and I look like the boy who lives next door. By looking at me, you would not dream that I'm gay, and that's the way I like it.

All I'm asking is that you treat me the same way you did before you heard me say, "By the way, it's time to tell you that I'm gay." — Nameless, San Raphael, Calif.

NAMELESS: Thanks for your heartfelt plea for acceptance.

The teen years are tough for everybody, and many young people, as they struggle to gain independence and establish an identity, wind up thinking they're different from the rest of the world. This sense of isolation is intensified when some condition or facet of their lives, such as being gay, actually does set them apart.

I applaud your courage and strength. Even though your family was "horrified" to learn you were gay, telling them was the right thing to do. Gay teens who hide their sexual identity from their parents suffer confusion, guilt and, worst of all, deep, impenetrable isolation. Some — far too many — wind up being unable to cope with the conflict between inner identity and external expectations and resort to suicide.

As a former teacher, coach and administrator, I very much enjoyed the opportunity to work with teens of different races, religions and ethnic backgrounds. It didn't matter. To me, they were all in one category — teens.

It doesn't matter to me that you are gay. What does matter is that you took time to express your views. I respect that and hope others will as well. Contact me at any time. I'll always be here to do my very best to offer a helping hand.

Dr. Robert Wallace welcomes questions from readers. Although he is unable to reply to all of them individually, he will answer as many as possible in this column. E-mail him at rwallace@galesburg.net. To find out more about Dr. Robert Wallace and read features by other Creators Syndicate writers and cartoonists, visit the Creators Syndicate website at www.creators.com.

COPYRIGHT 2009 CREATORS.COM


Comments

1 Comments | Post Comment
I would just like the writer of this letter to know that he is supported by more people than he realizes. I think lots of people who protest are actually gay themselves and terrified. To come out in high school is a brave thing to do.but he should know that there IS life after high school, and that he will find his place in the world. Nameless, please get help for your thoughts of suicide. It's a permanent solution to a temporary problem. Gays are accepted more everyday, as evidenced by the increasing number of states sanctioning gay marriage. I'm on your side and I'm a 56 year old heterosexual woman. Try to ignore the ignorant remarks, and enjoy your life. Don't give up. Things will get better. About dot com has an excellent page listing support groups and advice for gay teens. Good luck. I wish you a long and happy life.
Comment: #1
Posted by: Jayn Cameron
Thu Aug 12, 2010 6:06 PM
Already have an account? Log in.
New Account  
Your Name:
Your E-mail:
Your Password:
Confirm Your Password:

Please allow a few minutes for your comment to be posted.

Enter the numbers to the right:  
Creators.com comments policy
More
Dr. Robert Wallace
Feb. `12
Su Mo Tu We Th Fr Sa
29 30 31 1 2 3 4
5 6 7 8 9 10 11
12 13 14 15 16 17 18
19 20 21 22 23 24 25
26 27 28 29 1 2 3
About the author About the author
Write the author Write the author
Printer friendly format Printer friendly format
Email to friend Email to friend
View by Month