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Character Isn't Measured by Height

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DR. WALLACE: I'm responding to the letter from a 16-year-old girl who was being taunted by her girlfriends because she was taller than her boyfriend. I went through high school being self-conscious about my height. At age 13, I was already 5 feet 7 inches tall and taller than most of my teachers. I met and married a wonderful guy who is shorter than I am.

Sixteen years after our marriage, a semi-truck hit a car I was riding in, and I suffered a broken spine. For the past 30 years, I have been confined to a wheelchair. You can now say that I am 4 feet 5 inches tall and look up to my husband, who is a giant of a man. To me, he is the tallest and most wonderful man on this earth. Every night I give thanks to the good Lord for blessing me with a perfect partner. - Melody, Rochester, N.Y.

MELODY: Thank you for your inspiring message. It will provide comfort to all couples in similar relationships who might feel a bit self-conscious about height difference. Character isn't measured in feet and inches.

I MADE ONE LITTLE MISTAKE

DR. WALLACE: I'm 19, and the girl I've been going with for two years told me she never wanted to see me again because of one little mistake, which I admitted to. If we don't get this patched up, then two years of our lives will have been wasted. Don't you think my girlfriend should be compassionate and forgive me? One little mistake isn't too bad, is it? - Brandon, Charlotte, N.C.

BRANDON: One little mistake? You don't say what it is and I won't speculate, but obviously it wasn't so little from the point of view of your "ex" girlfriend.

Everything is relative. All you can do is apologize and ask forgiveness. If she chooses not to forgive you, your best bet is to learn from the mistake and get on with your life. And if you are fortunate to be in the company of another young lady, make sure your "one little mistake" doesn't happen again.

MY BEST FRIEND'S DATING A JERK

DR. WALLACE: I'm 16 and so is my very best friend, Tracey. Lately, Tracey has been dating a guy who is a total jerk. I told her so, but Tracey wouldn't listen to me. She is still seeing this guy. What can I do to convince her that she shouldn't be seeing him? - Lauren, Vancouver, Wash.

LAUREN: You did your part by warning Tracey that you feel the guy she is seeing is a total jerk. It's up to Tracey to decide if she wants to continue dating this guy. Who knows? Is it possible that your friend thinks she can influence him to change his ways?

Dr. Robert Wallace welcomes questions from readers. Although he is unable to reply to all of them individually, he will answer as many as possible in this column. Email him at rwallace@galesburg.net. To find out more about Dr. Robert Wallace and read features by other Creators Syndicate writers and cartoonists, visit the Creators Syndicate website at www.creators.com.

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Comments

2 Comments | Post Comment
"If we don't get this patched up, then two years of our lives will have been wasted."
***********
Nope. Not every pair of shoes you try on is comfortable; not every jacket you try is flattering, not every job will be a good fit for you, not every relationship is meant to last. The time spent in trying is never wasted unless you fail to appreciate each experience both for what it is now AND as a learning tool that adds to your personal growth to help you in the future. That is to say, "I've never found a Nike shoe that fits my foot, so I'll not count on finding something in that seciton of the store" "Hmmm, this color makes me look washed out, so I'm going to see if they have it in another color" "I don't like retail sales, so I'm going to back to school" or "Next time, I'll look for someone who's less clingy".

Or, "Not a good idea to kiss my ex when I'm exclusive with someone else" or whatever you did.

Regardless, doesn't matter if you think your girlfriend should change her mind, if Dr. Wallace thinks she should, or if a whole chorus of people commenting here agrees. She didn't write for advice -- you did. So here's some -- back off.
Comment: #1
Posted by: hedgehog
Sat Jan 14, 2012 8:57 AM
LW1: I'm concerned about your wording. What did you expect? A life commitment at your age? Get some therapy.

LW2: If you kill him she will no longer be able to date him. Just kidding. Friendship isn't about control - its about support. If she isn't asking for your opinion about him - don't offer it. She needs to make her own mistakes and learn from them. Just be there for when the pain comes and don't say I told you so.
Comment: #2
Posted by: Diana
Sat Jan 14, 2012 2:45 PM
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