The New Math: 2 Equals 0 Dear Cheryl: I'm 19, and I have a lot of things going for me. I work and I go to school. I have a boyfriend that I've been with for four years. But my problem is that I have a best male friend that I've known for five years, and we're attracted to …Read more. World's Most Reasonable Wife It sounds like an episode of "The Young and the Restless," but it's real life. Amy's real life. Amy and Jason had been married for nine years when she discovered that Jason had been having an affair for a year with his secretary, Diana. And if that …Read more. One Day at a Time One of the most devastating things that can happen to any wife is to find out that her husband is having an affair. First comes the shock. You want to go to bed and wake up and find it was just a horrible nightmare. Then there's the feeling of utter …Read more. Where Have All the Sugar Daddies Gone? Dear Cheryl: You've written in the past about who pays for dates. The consensus seems to be that early dating should be a two-way street. I think that one important factor has been left out of this discussion. A man gets ready for a date: He showers …Read more.more articles
There's something between a totally blind date and a date with someone you know. That's when you meet face-to-face with someone you've been talking to on the telephone. You like their voice and their personality, and based on that, you've made some assumptions about their appearance. What are the chance you're right?
JACOB: I left my wife because she had put me in serious debt. One day I got a call from a female bill collector. We spoke for some time about making arrangements for payment. The more I spoke to her, the more I enjoyed speaking with her. I loved her voice.
She reminded me of a past girlfriend whom I should've married. Every time I spoke with her, all I could imagine was my old girlfriend.
We had a lot in common, so we spoke again — but not about my debt. She said she liked my voice, too. The time came when we decided to meet. I'm no Mario Lopez, but I consider myself an above-average-looking man.
We met at a restaurant close to her job. I was quite disappointed that she didn't look like my old girlfriend. She was quite unattractive and very overweight. I'm sure she sensed my disappointment. But like a gentleman, I tried to have a nice conversation with her.
After a short while, we hugged and went our own ways. I told her to stay in touch. Although she wasn't what I thought she'd be, she was still a good person. I really did enjoy speaking with her, but she told me she knew I didn't have any interest in her. I told her that I enjoyed meeting her and would love to continue speaking with her from time to time.
I really did want to continue that, but she wouldn't answer my calls after a few attempts. I gave up and moved on.
DESIREE: He contacted me though an online dating service. He seemed very cool on the phone and in his instant messages. He had a very snarky sense of humor, which I appreciate. We didn't exchange much information about physical appearance because, in his words, "that's just not important." We agreed to meet at a bar in his neighborhood, and I could tell by his expression that he was immediately disappointed.
Despite being incredibly chatty on the phone, he suddenly couldn't find anything to say, other than bitching about his ex, his job, and the bar and its patrons — which he had picked! He suggested moving to another location, which I knew was an attempt to shake me.
As we were walking to my car, I said: "Look, it seems to me that you're not having a good time, and I can tell you're not digging me at all. So, why don't we both salvage our Friday night and move on?" He touched my arm for a second, said "Thanks!" and practically ran away from me.
I went to a familiar bar and washed him away, and that was that. I realize I'm not a model, but I'm not hideous, either. His reaction to me was an indication that he was not only shallow, but completely self-absorbed, as well.
Did a blind date turn out to be a total disaster? Or a happily-ever-after? Send your tale, along with your relationship questions and problems to email@example.com.
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