Tales From the Front by Cheryl Lavin

Diane, you'll remember, is the woman who had an affair with Eddie while he was married. It ended. Then his wife died. Eddie wanted to continue the affair; Diane wanted a relationship. When it was clear she was never going to be any more than a booty call, she ended it.

She thought the problem was that Eddie wasn't over his wife.

I said the problem was that in Eddie's mind, Diane was, is and always will be a booty call.

Here's what you had to say . . .

RAFF: Their affair began shortly after Eddie got married. What was he to her? Nothing more than a booty call.

YOLANDA: Yes, Diane was the booty-call girl. Yes, Eddie was a raging hypocrite for cutting off his uncle and then doing the same thing his uncle did. Yes, he was a jerk to his wife — first for cheating on her, then by complaining about his lack of sex to Diane and finally, hopping in bed with Diane before the grass had grown over his wife's grave. SANDRA: Eddie is a hypocrite and a major jerk. As long as Diane was his doormat, willing to go along with whatever was convenient for him, he was happy. He's not mature enough to see his faults. Good riddance!

KARLA: Yes, Diane was a booty call, but let's look at why. I suspect Eddie has antiquated views of women and lumps them into two categories: respectable and trash. One you bring home, and one you have fun with. Because Diane was willing to have an affair with him while he was married, he lumped her in the trash category.

Remember that antiquated views have inherently different standards for men and women, so to him it was OK that he had a mistress, but she was a cheap slut.

Once a guy who thinks like Eddie throws a woman into the trash category, she'll never leave it.

The fact that Eddie didn't want to have an affair with Diane has nothing to do with grieving for his wife. It just makes Diane feel better to think that. He'll meet someone he considers respectable and she'll have full status.

FAITH: It doesn't matter how born-again Diane is. Eddie ain't about to have a relationship with the woman who, simply by existing, reminds him that he cheated on his wife and was willing to meet his demand for sex without a relationship even after his wife died.

SHEILA: Eddie sounds like a jerk, but he's right about at one thing. Diane does have incredibly low self-esteem. If she didn't, she wouldn't continue to beg him to continue the relationship and work things out. There's nothing to work out.

Even if he wanted to, he would never have an open relationship with her and introduce her to his family. He would be terrified that it would eventually slip out that they had been sexually involved while his wife was still living.

MARK: In Eddie's mind, Diane will always be the "dirty little secret" that he's ashamed of.

What's the best, worst, funniest gift your partner ever gave you? Send your tale, along with your questions, problems and rants to cheryllavinrapp@gmail.com. To find out more about Cheryl Lavin, and read features by other Creators Syndicate writers and cartoonists, visit www.creators.com.

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