After 15 years of abuse, Courtney had enough when Duncan stabbed her five times with a knife and almost cut off her thumb. The next time she knew he'd be away from home for a while, she left.

"I packed up my kids and my most important stuff and drove for four days, all the way to the other side of the United States."

She had a friend serve him with divorce papers. She requested a lifetime restraining order against him and got it. A week after the divorce was legal, she changed her name and then petitioned for a new social security number.

"I found out that in 1998, with the help of Al Gore, it became easier for women who are victims of domestic violence to get new numbers. So I got together all the police and medical reports. My children's social security numbers were also changed."

A week after they got their new cards, Courtney moved her family another 2,000 miles to a state where they knew no one.

"I started my life with my new identity. I got a bank account at a credit union because regular banks wanted so much proof and all I had was an ID that I had trouble getting an account at a bank. First, I had to get a new birth certificate from my home state. I had to explain my situation to the director of vital statistics. I opened a secured credit card and began to live under my new name. It was scary and my kids and I know that there are certain things we don't talk about with other people.

"It's like my old identity fell off the face of the earth. That's the way I wanted it. Duncan has family members who are policemen and a relative who works for the IRS, so they are on top of those things. I had to change my identity to get him out of my life."

It's a year since Courtney left. "My kids and I are doing so much better. I've got a great job. We travel. I can't express how much relief I feel now that he's out of my life. I can breathe again. I've made friends with great people, but I'm quite guarded about my personal life. I haven't been in a relationship since I left him. I just haven't been ready.

"Outing him on YouTube: (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kqW2JxmlBgE) is helping me heal."

How many times have you let the same dog bite you? Send your tale, along with your questions, problems and rants to [email protected]. To find out more about Cheryl Lavin, and read features by other Creators Syndicate writers and cartoonists, visit www.creators.com.