Tales From the Front by Cheryl Lavin

What makes the leader of the free world think he can have an affair with an intern in the Oval Office and no one will find out? What makes a presidential candidate think his aide can claim to be the father of his child and no one will question it?

What makes a governor known for cracking down on prostitution hire prostitutes? What makes the most famous athlete in the world think he can have affairs with dozens of bimbos and not get caught?

What's with these guys?

David thinks he knows.

"Some people have a super power that allows them to have their cake and eat it, too. Usually it comes from some combination of wealth, charm, good looks, political power and/or success in arts, athletics or entertainment.

"We are constantly bombarded with reminders that these things come with all kinds of perks and 'Get Out of Jail Free' cards."

(Sometimes the Get Out of Jail Free cards are real. Just ask O.J. Simpson and Robert Blake. And how many chances did Robert Downey Jr. get to clean up his act?)

"Say I have a staff of professionals whose livelihoods depend on my being appealing and popular. My fixers and polishers earn every penny of their six-figure salaries and are hungry for things they cannot get without making my problems disappear."

(In his book "The Politician," John Edwards' aide, Andrew Young, who was making $300,000 a year, admitted his was totally financially dependent on his boss.)

"Knowing that these people have my back, my bad behavior does not seem so risky any more. And no matter what I say to others or to myself, we all know that the risk of getting caught is always half the fun, so I have to go way overboard to get my thrills."

(That must be the reason why those billionaires are obsessed with sailing hot air balloons around the world!)

"Successful people are driven by new challenges and conquests.

(Calling George Clooney!)

"It may be unfair of these people to promise monogamy. Many of their spouses understand that monogamy would kill their spirits just as surely as remaining unmarried would kill their careers."

(What are the chances of a bachelor becoming president?)

"The super-successful often attract spouses who have no interest in a monogamous partner. When these non-famous spouses finally do leave, it's not because they object to their husband having sex with other women. Rather, it's because the famous person makes it too publicly embarrassing to stay. Just as there's a stigma attached cheating, there's also a stigma attached to tolerating it."

(Hillary Clinton took plenty of flak from feminists from standing by her man, but she had the last laugh. She's secretary of state, and he's the ex-president.)

"No matter how much Tiger Woods may have wanted to stand up in front of God, his family and friends and say, 'I promise to forsake all others as long as I'm within a hundred miles of my wife,' realistic vows are simply not socially acceptable."

Have you let money or success or power go to your head? Send your tale, along with your questions and problems to cheryllavin@aol.com. And check out my blog www.talesfromthefront.com. To find out more about Cheryl Lavin, and read features by other Creators Syndicate writers and cartoonists, visit www.creators.com.

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