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Helping Over-Empowered High-School Students Is Not Easy
Q: My question is related to my role as a high-school teacher. I have my master's in special education with a concentration on students with emotional disabilities. I've taught for the last 15 years as either a special education or English teacher, …Read more.
When Should a Child be IQ Tested? and Death Is Frightening to Children
Q: At what point should IQ testing be conducted? We have an only child — a girl who is in kindergarten.
A: There's no specific time that all children should be given individual IQ tests by a psychologist. Schools often arrange for group IQ …Read more.
Grandson May be More Difficult During Grandma's Visit
Q: I'm concerned about my 2-year-old grandson who seems very needy and demanding. He cries for at least an hour after his mom leaves. Occasionally, distraction works but not often. He says, "It's mine" over and over about everything in his …Read more.
The Paradox of Late Reading and Student Must Make Careful Investment
Q: I have a 7-year-old son who is not reading yet. He has five older brothers in gifted programs, and he's up to par with them when they were age 7, other than reading. Do I wait until he reads well to have him tested?
A: Although very bright …Read more.
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It's Time To Say No To DadQ. I'm married and a mother of three with a loving, stable home. My two older children are from a previous relationship that ended when they were ages 6 months and 3½ years old. They're now 9 and 6 years old. Their father struggled with drug addiction since before they were born, going in and out of sobriety. Every year and a half or so, I get the eternal "I'm sober for good now" and a request to start seeing the boys, which I eventually allow. He'll be the perfect parent for a few weeks and then disappear, after which I comfort them and try to explain things. I'm lost and don't know what to do. Should I let the boys continue having the few-and-far-between visits, keeping hope that one will last? How do I explain to my 6-year-old that he can't go see Daddy because I haven't a clue where he ran off to this time? Should I refuse visits altogether to protect them? I hear horror stories of children resenting their mother down the road because they weren't given the chance to have a relationship with their father. A. You've been more than fair to father and sons. It's time to say no to protect your sons from feelings of predictable rejection by their father. He cares more about drugs than his children. They have a stepfather who undoubtedly loves them and on whom they can count for fathering. When they become adults they can choose whether to build a relationship with their biological dad, but for now, explain that their father is too ill to play a true fathering role. They'll feel safer and more secure; hopefully, when they're adults and you can explain the issues, they'll thank you for the decision you've made. For a free newsletter about helping children cope with divorce, send a large self-addressed, stamped envelope to P.O. Box 32, Watertown, WI, 53094, or read "Helping Your Children Cope With Divorce" at www.sylviarimm.com. Teen Hibernator Will Miss His Room Q.
A. Since you're planning to renovate the houseboat you'll move into, it's probably best to complete the renovation before you move in. Your teen could be a good assistant for this job. Once he spends time fixing up the boat, he may become enthusiastic about the move and you may not have to persuade him. Houseboats don't allow much privacy, and I expect your son is worried that he'd miss that room he hibernates in. If he's still resistant when you've completed the renovation, consider using the houseboat as a vacation home until your son graduates high school. When your son goes to college or lives on his own, you could move to the boat with the younger children. For a free newsletter about moving to a new home, self-addressed, stamped envelope to P.O. Box 32, Watertown, WI, 53094, or go to www.sylviarimm.com for more parenting information. Dr. Sylvia B. Rimm is the director of the Family Achievement Clinic in Cleveland, Ohio, a clinical professor of psychiatry and pediatrics at the Case Western Reserve University School of Medicine, and the author of many books on parenting. More information on raising kids is available at www.sylviarimm.com. Please send questions to: Sylvia B. Rimm on Raising Kids, P.O. Box 32, Watertown, WI 53094 or srimm@sylviarimm.com. To read features by other Creators Syndicate writers and cartoonists, visit the Creators Syndicate website at www.creators.com. COPYRIGHT 2008 CREATORS SYNDICATE, INC.
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