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Toxic Confusion
DEAR SUSAN: Just recently, I told a female friend my true feelings about her. She said she wished I hadn't because she's seeing someone. Now I'm confused. Does she wish I didn't tell her because it could cause a problem with her current relationship …Read more.
Skin-Deep Romance
DEAR SUSAN: After a 15-year marriage, I'm dating again. The man is good-looking and sincere and has a great sense of humor. But in his youth, he was into motorcycling and drinking (he's 47), and he has tattoos that almost cover his arms. He's gentle …Read more.
Forward March!
DEAR SUSAN: I know this is the 21st century, but my roots are in the 1950s, and dating etiquette has me stymied. I just spent the weekend with a friend who is becoming more than a friend, and that's the dilemma. Distance keeps us from seeing each …Read more.
Fears and Habit
DEAR SUSAN: I know a thing or two about dead-end relationships. I dated a woman for 10 years who loved and needed me but wouldn't marry. It got to the point where I finally decided the relationship was holding me back in life, mostly because of my …Read more.
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Tracking DeviceDEAR SUSAN: My fiance is very personable and giving but is close friends with a married woman. I don't know the depth of their relationship or whether they've been physical, but I have my suspicions. (Of course, he denies everything and says it's all my imagination.) My family and friends don't believe him; they think I've lost it! I've often thought of having him followed, but what good would that do? I must decide whether or not to leave. — Laura L., Long Island, N.Y. DEAR LAURA: If you read your letter again, you'll discover you've already signed an exit visa. You're outta there, with a click of the heels and a smile. C'mon now. Your instincts — woman's intuition? — are shouting it's time to leave; your loving family seconds the emotion; and — most telling of all — you yourself are thinking of having him followed! Duh. Well, the best of all tracking devices is your own gut, and don't ever forget that. If someone seems untrustworthy, if a situation smells fishy, you can bet your sweet bippy it is. And when this travesty is over — and it won't be long now — you'll have learned that valuable lesson. Consider this a wake-up call to stay alert (24/7) to your inner cues. To trust them, not to override them, to treat them like the best buddies they are. Brava feminine intuition. SEX AND CHOCOLATE: AN OPEN LETTER. LET'S GET BEHIND OUR WARRIORS. Visit http://CommunityOfVeterans.org and http://SupportYourVet.org. DEAR SUSAN: How would you react to a boyfriend who used to call three times a day but won't even come to visit when you're sick in the hospital? — Bernadette M., Portland, Ore. DEAR BERNADETTE: Slowly, very slowly. I would be very careful to hear him out, to listen to his reasons for not visiting. There are people who become ill even walking in a hospital corridor. Something about the odors, the partially open doors with partial views of sick people in bed, and nurses administering medications can actually trigger memories and physical symptoms for some people. If my boyfriend were not one of them, he'd need an awfully good explanation for his being a no-show. Without one, he'd be a nowhere man. Bye-bye. Write to Susan Deitz in care of this newspaper. She will answer all letters that come with a self-addressed, stamped envelope. Or you may e-mail her at info@creators.com. COPYRIGHT 2009 CREATORS.COM
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