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Lovelorn Single Laments Loss
Dear John: I am a 28-year-old male. I've recently had a breakup with my girlfriend of seven years. This has been the most painful experience I've ever had.
I deeply love and care for "Linda," but she is now currently dating someone else. I …Read more.
Boyfriend Moves in With Ex
Dear John: I am a college student who has been dating my boyfriend for three years, all of which have been long distance. I am graduating in the next few months and have accepted a job near him. We have plans to get married in the near future.
…Read more.
Professional Affair Upsets Career
Dear John: I've been having an affair with "Jack," a married co-worker, for three years. We both knew it was wrong, but a relationship started, then cooled off out of guilt.
Jack has been nervous around me lately. Currently, we've both …Read more.
Woman Worries She Was an 'Easy Target'
Dear John: I've just ended an abusive marriage. After leaving my husband, I have started seeing a man who is about five years younger than me, and once again, I have gotten burned pretty badly.
I think he saw me as an easy target because of my …Read more.
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John Gray's Men Are From Mars, Women Are From Venus, January 28Dear John: I am 41-year-old male who is happily married to a wonderful and beautiful 32-year-old woman. Frequently, I buy her sexy lingerie. I tend to associate these items with our intimate times together. However, she feels as if it is no big deal to wear these items during her everyday activities! I can't seem to make her understand that I don't like her doing this. How can I get over this and not worry about her reason for doing so? — For My Eyes Only in St. Paul, Minn. Dear For My Eyes Only: Ask her again to reconsider these intimate items as something just as special for her as they are for you. Tell her that it makes you feel as if you both share something that no one else has. If that disappoints her, then it could be that wearing these items reminds her of you. Perhaps, because they make her feel happy, wanted and desirable, she wears them to carry a subtle reminder of you throughout the day. Hmmm. On second thought: You wouldn't deny her that, now would you? Dear John: I have been dating "Jason" for almost a year now. He was the best thing that had ever happened to me, so I said yes when he asked me to marry him. He has been divorced for six years. However, his 14-year-old daughter will not accept anyone he has dated, and Sam just broke up with me because of her. She quit visiting him when she was home from school because of me. She has never met me, but she doesn't like me. It could be anyone, not just me. He thinks that their relationship would be better if he just didn't get involved with anyone.
I know we want our kids to be happy, but I think we should think of ourselves, too. What do you think about this? — Almost His Wife in Cleveland Dear Almost His Wife: You are right in your assessment that your fiance's fear of losing his daughter is greater than any other desire he has right now, including his desire to be with you. Many children of all ages find it hard to accept the demise of their parents' marriage. This case is particularly sad because enough time has passed since the divorce, and his daughter is certainly of an age where she should be able to accept his need to get on with the rest of his life. If she truly wants what is best for him, she should acknowledge this need and wish him her best in finding happiness. You and I know this, but the one that has to realize this is your fiance. Right now, he has decided not to test her ultimatums. Until he wakes up to the fact that her action and his reaction won't fix things, he'll miss out at another chance at love. Still, that does not mean that you have to hang in there. Instead, get on with your own life. Hopefully, one day he will realize that he should get on with his own life as well. John Gray is the author of "Men Are From Mars, Women Are From Venus." If you have a question, write to John in care of this newspaper or by e-mail at: comments@marsvenusliving.com. All questions are kept anonymous and will be paraphrased. To find out more about John Gray and read features by other Creators Syndicate writers and cartoonists, visit the Creators Syndicate website at www.creators.com. COPYRIGHT 2010 JOHN GRAY'S MARS VENUS ADVICE
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