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Lovelorn Single Laments Loss
Dear John: I am a 28-year-old male. I've recently had a breakup with my girlfriend of seven years. This has been the most painful experience I've ever had.
I deeply love and care for "Linda," but she is now currently dating someone else. I …Read more.
Boyfriend Moves in With Ex
Dear John: I am a college student who has been dating my boyfriend for three years, all of which have been long distance. I am graduating in the next few months and have accepted a job near him. We have plans to get married in the near future.
…Read more.
Professional Affair Upsets Career
Dear John: I've been having an affair with "Jack," a married co-worker, for three years. We both knew it was wrong, but a relationship started, then cooled off out of guilt.
Jack has been nervous around me lately. Currently, we've both …Read more.
Woman Worries She Was an 'Easy Target'
Dear John: I've just ended an abusive marriage. After leaving my husband, I have started seeing a man who is about five years younger than me, and once again, I have gotten burned pretty badly.
I think he saw me as an easy target because of my …Read more.
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JOHN GRAY'S MEN ARE FROM MARS, WOMEN ARE FROM VENUSDear John: What do you do when your boyfriend won't stop his mother and sister from making rude remarks about you? I have asked him repeatedly to come to my defense, but he never does. I get so angry that I talk back to them. Of course, this causes fights between us. His family enjoys this because they want me to move out. My relationship is being ruined by these people! — Ready to Walk in Deer Park, N.Y. Dear Ready to Walk: It's not uncommon for men to be reluctant to step into disputes between their mothers and their girlfriends or wives. Unfortunately, your boyfriend has decided to back their position by repeatedly failing to come to your defense. If you marry him, expect more of the same. If you're looking for a man who will support you, it's time you realized that this is not that guy. Keep your options open. Dear John: I'm married and a mother of a 7-year-old. I also work full time and take three online classes each semester in order to earn my degree. My only break is when I go for my gym workout each day. My house looks horrible all the time because I get absolutely no help from my husband. When he comes home from work, he spreads out on the couch and stays there.
If I say something to him about helping, he gets defensive and starts yelling at me. He's even threatened divorce. Other than this, our relationship is wonderful. What should I do? — Frazzled in St. Louis Dear Frazzled: You could go on a full-out strike, but that just means that the mess will keep getting bigger. Instead, go for a compromise in which you share the chores. Wait for a time when you feel he will be the most receptive to hearing what you have to say. Tell him you just want him to do his fair share. Make a list of the chores: dishes, vacuuming, laundry, dusting, making beds, etc. Ask him to choose the half that he wants to do. Now make sure to keep the list in plain sight, so both of you can refer to it as needed. If he still refuses to help in any way, ask him to go to counseling with you. The issue may be bigger than a messy house. John Gray is the author of "Men Are From Mars, Women Are From Venus." If you have a question, write to John in care of this newspaper or by e-mail at: comments@marsvenusliving.com. All questions are kept anonymous and will be paraphrased. To find out more about John Gray and read features by other Creators Syndicate writers and cartoonists, visit the Creators Syndicate website at www.creators.com. COPYRIGHT 2009 JOHN GRAY'S MARS VENUS ADVICE
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