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Professional Affair Upsets Career
Dear John: I've been having an affair with "Jack," a married co-worker, for three years. We both knew it was wrong, but a relationship started, then cooled off out of guilt.
Jack has been nervous around me lately. Currently, we've both …Read more.
Woman Worries She Was an 'Easy Target'
Dear John: I've just ended an abusive marriage. After leaving my husband, I have started seeing a man who is about five years younger than me, and once again, I have gotten burned pretty badly.
I think he saw me as an easy target because of my …Read more.
Newlyweds Face Divorce
Dear John: Is the first year of marriage the easiest or the hardest? I am a 21-year-old man, and my wife is 19 years old. We're trying hard to make a marriage work, but I don't know if we'll survive beyond the first 12 months. What tips can you give …Read more.
BFF May Lose More Than Morals in Vegas
Dear John: I'm a bridesmaid in a wedding for a BFF. Before the big day, we'll all be going to Las Vegas. I have mixed feelings about this, because I know that the bride sees this as an opportunity for a "last fling." Her excuse is that she …Read more.
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JOHN GRAY'S MEN ARE FROM MARS, WOMEN ARE FROM VENUSDear John: About a week ago, my 7-year-old daughter had a nasty argument with her best friend. Now the friend has taken up with another girl, and my daughter is heartbroken. What's the best way for me to handle this situation? — Caring Mommy in Atlanta Dear Caring Mommy: Few things are more upsetting to a mother than to see her child snubbed by another. Unfortunately, we cannot force our children to play with someone they don't like; nor can we force others to play with our children. What we can do, however, is encourage our children to enlarge their circle of friends. First, allow your child to discuss her feelings with you. She must know that you are listening to her and that you empathize with those feelings. Next, ask her about other children she knows. What does she like about them? What games does she play with them? Finally, encourage her to invite them for a play date. You can also put your daughter into situations where she'll meet others. For example, taking her to your library's local reading hour, or signing her up for an art workshop, a dance class or a peewee soccer league. You cannot create her friendships, but you can create the situations where friendships can occur. Friends moving in and out of our lives is part of every life experience. As she creates a variety of friendships, she'll learn conflict resolution techniques and ways to demonstrate love and respect to her friends. Dear John: I'm engaged to be married to a woman that I love with all my heart.
Dear Does She Have Cold Feet?: The most important thing you can do is be supportive of her. It's just a simple fact that on Venus the wedding ceremony and reception is her personal "Super Bowl." To you it's a big day, but it doesn't carry the emotional weight that it does for her. That's OK. You're wired differently, and this won't be the last time that one of you puts more importance on a particular day or event that the other one doesn't fully understand. Let it be, and love her just the same as you always have. She's not asking you to fix the bridesmaids gowns; she just wants a sympathetic ear and a supportive man, when she needs one by her side. The run-up to the big day will get increasingly tense. She's caught up in the moment, as she should be. Love her, keep your sense of humor, and one day soon — hopefully, on your honeymoon — you can both look back on all this tension and just smile. John Gray is the author of "Men Are From Mars, Women Are From Venus." If you have a question, write to John in care of this newspaper or by e-mail at: comments@marsvenusliving.com. All questions are kept anonymous and will be paraphrased. To find out more about John Gray and read features by other Creators Syndicate writers and cartoonists, visit the Creators Syndicate website at www.creators.com. COPYRIGHT 2009 JOHN GRAY'S MARS VENUS ADVICE
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