Hey, Cherie! by Cherie Bennett

Hey, Cherie!

I'm a 15-year-old girl. I have been baby-sitting for three years for a bunch of people in my neighborhood, and I have saved almost all of the money I have made. Baby-sitting is great these days 'cause I get at least 10 dollars an hour. My friends know that I baby-sit a lot because whenever they call to do something on the weekend, I am usually busy already.

One friend, in particular, is always asking to borrow money from me because she knows I have it. It's usually only a few bucks, or once in a while, she needs like 20 dollars. She always says she will pay me back when she gets the cash, but so far I have only seen a couple bucks come back.

So when we want to go out shopping, I always ask her if she can afford whatever it is she wants to buy. She will say yes, and then when we get to the register, she is like, "Can I borrow some money? I promise I will pay you back." This has happened over and over. I really like her, and I hate saying no. So then I give her the money, and then I feel bad for giving it to her. She owes me almost 100 bucks now! How can I get her to pay me back, or at least stop asking?

—Tired of Being the Bank

Hey, Tired!

That's really very cool that you always want to help out your friend, and you should be happy that you have such a generous spirit. It can be hard to approach someone after lending them money when they have made little effort to return it. This has broken up a couple of my own friendships, and so I know how that feels.

But if you realize that you are giving her the money freely, then you really can't be mad at yourself. You have to realize that you may never see that money again. If it really bothers you to give it to her, then you will have to learn to say no when she asks.

She has a great friend in you, but if you continue to make it so easy for her, she may start taking advantage of your generosity. Learning to speak up for yourself will help you more then just "being the bank." And it will help her learn to be more responsible with her own money.

Hey, Cherie!

I will be going away with some friends for our winter break, and I can't wait! We will be gone for 10 days, and I am so excited! The problem is that I have never hung out that long with a couple of the girls that will be there, and they have never really talked to me or anything.

I am afraid it will be kind of awkward when we hang out, since I don't know them well. I am kinda shy, and I don't want to just sit back and be the bystander the whole time, but if I say or do something stupid, then I will never live it down. How can I make sure that doesn't happen?

—Excited but Scared

Hey, Excited!

Sounds like you have a great trip coming up. It's always fun to hang out and do something different with new friends. If there are any activities planned like skiing, snowboarding or hiking, then that's a great way to share something with these new friends. Having some common ground is a good place to start when you don't know what to say or do.

If you just be yourself and don't try too hard to make anyone like you, then you should have a great time and create some fun memories. You will always have this first trip in common, and that will bring you closer. Have fun!

Cherie Bennett is a best-selling author of books for teens and young adults. Visit her website at www.cheriebennett.com. To find out more about Cherie Bennett and read features by other Creators Syndicate writers and cartoonists, visit the Creators Syndicate website at www.creators.com.

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