Let the Bridal and Baby Shower Games Cease Already! by Mary Hunt on Creators.com

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Let the Bridal and Baby Shower Games Cease Already!

Dear Mary: I am stuck in a cycle of nonstop bridal and baby showers. Once wedding events are finished for one couple, the baby showers start, until the next bridal showers start again for someone else. By now, I dread the typical shower games and activities. Do you have any ideas for throwing successful showers without the games and without breaking the bank? — Shan, e-mail

Dear Shan: Take control, girl! There is no protocol that says you must play games at a shower. Serve a lovely lunch or afternoon refreshment. Ask a close friend to give a "devotional," or short inspirational talk, about the bride- or mother-to-be, and allow your guests to enjoy one another. Once the gifts are opened, thank your guests for coming and help the guest of honor pack up to go home. That's what I would do. However, I know readers will have many alternatives for you. So let's invite them to share. When they do, I'll pass along their ideas!

Dear Mary: How can I stop the flood of spam e-mail that I receive? I have my spam filter set, and I flag the e-mails that make it through as junk, but they keep coming and coming. What am I missing? — Leslie, e-mail

Dear Leslie: I wish I knew. I have done all the things you mention, but still my inbox fills with junk. I've come to the conclusion that some junk is just the price we pay for the convenience of e-mail. I find it to be a small annoyance compared with e-mail's benefits.

Dear Mary: I read the recent "Everyday Cheapskate" column about using free Wi-Fi in public places instead of paying for service at home.

It's a good idea in principle, but I also have read that using freely available Wi-Fi isn't secure. When you go somewhere like Starbucks, other people can get access to your private information, including passwords and account numbers, and even hack into your laptop. Maybe this won't happen, but it could. I'm not a geek, but a couple of computer newsletters I get advise people to be careful whenever they are on public networks, because personal information can be compromised. — Marianne R., e-mail

Dear Marianne: You are right. I have confirmed this. You never should access your bank account or pay bills online while using a public Wi-Fi connection. That's one of the drawbacks to not having Internet access that you pay for. If you do not have access to a secure connection, say, at work or at the home of a friend or relative, pay your bills through the mail, the old-fashioned way. There always is going to be give-and-take when you choose to cut your expenses in significant ways. The trick is to find reasonable work-arounds that will allow you to make those cuts.

Do you have a question for Mary? E-mail her at mary@everydaycheapskate.com, or write to Everyday Cheapskate, P.O. Box 2135, Paramount, CA 90723. Mary Hunt is the founder of www.DebtProofLiving.com and author of 18 books, including "Can I Pay My Credit Card Bill With a Credit Card?" To find out more about Mary and read her past columns, please visit the Creators Syndicate Web page at www.creators.com.

Comments

7 Comments | Post Comment

Spam email--My husband has arranged our personal email accounts so that they go first to a gmail address, then get routed to our email programs. Google has an excellent spam filter. We almost never get any. I believe the same is true of Yahoo.

Never give your real email address on the open internet. I give the gmail one if I don't know who can see it. And my web page has a comment form, not an email address.

Comment: #1
Posted by:
Thu Jul 15, 2010 6:21 AM

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I second the idea to have your own spam account to filter what you get, but one way to reduce the spam is to never reply to it, even to tell them to stop, If you reply it confirms that yours is a valid account and it gets marked to sell on a priority list.

If you are asked for your email make sure you read their privacy agreement. If a company doesn't state up front that they do not sell your information there is a good chance that they do.

Comment: #2
Posted by: Sharon
Thu Jul 15, 2010 10:27 PM

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I'm also in the

Comment: #3
Posted by: Beth
Fri Jul 16, 2010 7:31 AM

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I'm also in the wedding shower/baby shower cycle. What we have started to do is have "Co-Ed Showers." We invite males and females and have a potluck cookout. Everyone seems to enjoy it better than traditional showers, and it really cuts down on costs. We don't do any games!!! It's more of a party where you just happen to bring shower gifts.

Comment: #4
Posted by: Beth
Fri Jul 16, 2010 7:33 AM

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To expand on what Mary told LW3, it's true that it's a very bad idea enter user names and passwords, or conduct online monetary transactions while accessing a public Wi-Fi network. I would like to clarify that while it is theoretically possible to capture personal information, user names and password, the technical skills required to do so is well beyond the capabilities of the typical average people using these networks. In addition to the skill, specialized packet sniffing software is also required. Furthermore, let me be the one to inform readers that there is NO such thing as security. Period. That lock on your door, password on your account or fence around your yard are little more than obstacles to be overcome by those with the proper skills. Therefore, be mindful of all your online activities, regardless of whether or not you're using your own personal computer or one located in the lobby of a busy hotel. On a final note, E-mails, documents and especially online postings are forever even if you've "deleted" them. I've successfully recovered ancient files from hard drives that were formatted several times over the lifetime of a computer! Never discard old computers in the trash or give them away to charity. Ensure the hard disks are removed and physically destroyed or at the very least, securely wiped by a professional skilled in the task (not your pimple-faced teen aged neighbor geek!)

Comment: #5
Posted by: Chris
Sat Jul 17, 2010 5:54 AM

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One way to cut down on junk mail is to have 2 email addresses. One that you only give to people you know..and one that you use when you do stuff like join facebook, and register stuff online or whatever else you may use it for you can set up a hotmail or yahoo freebe email for that stuff.. All of the junk mail will go to the second email address so you will have to check it occasionally and empty the inbox but then your personal email should be pretty much junk mail free, or it is in my case.

Comment: #6
Posted by: Sissie
Sat Jul 17, 2010 6:59 PM

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RE SPAM: the spam detection and prevention software is only as good as your provider, I have both a verizon account and a yahoo account and the Yahoo account catches way more spam than the verizon account. Yahoo has been doing a very good job lately of blocking spam and deactivating (usually stolen) accounts of spammers. Also, if you post comments online, have a blog, etc... your internet activities could be leaving your email open for people to grab it and spam it. Make sure where ever you post cannot post your email address publicly. If a friend of yours has had their account stolen, the spammer will take all the addresses in the address book and sell it to other websites for spamming purposes as well. Any time you respond by saying 'take me off your list', you tell the spammer that your account is active and the spamming will continue. Legitimate websites will remove you from the list if you email them back. So don't bother sending an email request to be removed to a spammer.

Comment: #7
Posted by: Laurie
Sun Jul 18, 2010 5:14 PM

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