ETHNICALLY SPEAKING by Larry Meeks on Creators.com

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Farewell Dear Larry: You are the sanest man in America! I look forward to your columns because I ALWAYS agree with your answers. Great work! Thanks for speaking the simple truth about all issues — racial, political, parental, common sense, etc. I often …Read more. Hate Groups Dear Larry: I want to forget for a moment that it is their constitutional right, because I detest the Ku Klux Klan, neo-Nazis and all other groups that preach hate. A long time ago, they came into cities across America without any protest. Now …Read more. Troubles With Raising Teenage Son Dear Larry: I am African-American and a single mother with three children, ages 15, 10 and 8. All of them are boys. I am having a lot of problems with them, especially the eldest. He argues with me about almost everything. He thinks he is the man/…Read more. How To Get Race Relations Back on Track Dear Larry: So many of my friends are upset with the way things are going, especially race relations. They are not saying anything openly, but among themselves there is constant complaining and fear. There is something simmering and brewing that …Read more.

Ethnically Speaking, September 20

Dear Larry: In all of my 37 years, I never have written a letter to an advice columnist, nor have I felt moved to respond to anything — until today. The letter from "Worried Mom" moved me. In fact, if you had listed a phone number, I would have called immediately.

She wrote to you about the funny feelings she has regarding her new boyfriend's relationship with her 6-year-old son. This needs to be responded to immediately. She needs to take her son to the doctor or emergency room right away. I never have felt so confident about the probability that sexual abuse is happening.

While the mother is in the hospital, I recommend that she call the police so that the new doting boyfriend can be removed from her home and taken to jail. I am sure her son has been damaged. It is her responsibility to pay attention to her instincts and protect her child.

This boyfriend does not have a job, and I believe he does not work because it creates a situation in which he can be alone with her son.

I have said enough. Please, please contact this woman as soon as possible, and tell her to move fast. — DeAnna

Dear DeAnna: I do not have an address or phone number for this mother. I am printing your letter and the following letters in hopes that she will be moved to take action.

From JLR: As a principal of a school, I have heard many horror stories regarding children in their homes. One of the first things one must do is call the local Child Protective Services.

Most counselors and administrators will tell you that one of the first indicators of child molestation is the onset of bed-wetting.

From Another Worried Mom: I have something to say to "Worried Mom": Listen to your instincts! Please run, don't walk, and get away from this man! Your son's actions speak louder than words. There is something going on.

Your boyfriend does not have a job; you are doing all the work; and what is so sad is that you are sacrificing your son, to boot.

Looks to me as if your boyfriend is the one getting all the benefits while you struggle to make ends meet. His job appears to be to keep you hypnotized while he reaps the benefits, including access to your son.

Get this man out of your house before your son is hurt beyond repair. Your boyfriend's behavior is predatory.

You are your son's protector, and he only has you. Please, please don't let your precious child down. Protecting your child is the most important part of your job as a mother.

If you feel you still need this man, then send your son to live with his dad or grandma and grandpa.

Once your child is no longer there, I wonder how long your boyfriend will stick around.

From a Retired Teacher: This boyfriend is a pedophile and a leech. He is sexually abusing this child, and the man is threatening harm to the boy if he should tell.

Larry, tell the mother to move fast.

Dear Readers: We have done all we can. The rest is up to "Worried Mom." If you're listening, please write me again and let me know how you are doing.

To find out more about Larry G. Meeks and read features by other Creators Syndicate writers and cartoonists, visit the Creators Syndicate Web page at www.creators.com.

Comments

5 Comments | Post Comment

Funny how everyone automatically assumes that the boyfriend is a predator, without a shred of hard evidence to back it up. Here we've got people calling for the police to be brought in, for him to be prosecuted as a sex offender, and for his life to be ruined...all because some kid has started wetting the bed? Get a grip, people. Geesh. It's one thing for a man to be accused of being a worthless bum...and another to have these horrible charges leveled at him with no proof. This sort of thing ruins mens' lives, even when the charges are never proven and never result in a conviction.

Comment: #1
Posted by: Matt
Sat Sep 20, 2008 2:09 AM

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The first thing I thought of when I read the original letter was that he might be a molestor.

While it sounds highly suspicious, the mom should talk to her son, for Pete's sake. Ask him if the boyfriend has done any inappropriate touching, and take the boy to a psychologist who can also ask the right questions. That will determine if the boyfriend is indeed a predator. During all this, he should not be spending any more alone time with the boy. However, I hesitate to call the cops on someone accusing them of such a severe crime, and exposing the man to "guilty in the court of public opinion." If he is innocent, it could backfire. If he is guilty, the mom would have taken the appropriate steps.

Comment: #2
Posted by: Kit
Sat Sep 20, 2008 9:07 AM

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I wish there had been a link to the previous letter. There may be other things going on that are causing this child to start bed wetting, among them a physical problem. However, I think that any mother who brings a man into her home and her child's life needs to bring in a man who is above reproach and with all manly duties being performed - among them, working. Since she is managing to support three people, think about the luxuries her son is giving up because of it. He should be benefiting from lessons, sports, or other things that her income could be providing not just another person in the house.

Comment: #3
Posted by: BB
Sat Sep 20, 2008 3:19 PM

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The letter he is referencing is from Sept. 6th.

I think it's awful that parents bring their boyfriends/girlfriends to live with them so readily. Regardless of whether or not this particular man is abusing this child (although I agree that she needs to find out for sure, because it sounds likely from what she's said) there are way too many times that mommy's boyfriend abuses or even kills her children. I don't know why moms get involved with such losers, but they need to protect their children and not move in with the first guy they meet. If he really loves you, he will be willing to maintain his own home. And if he needs to move in because he lost his job and can't make ends meet, then he probably isn't a very good catch anyway.

Comment: #4
Posted by: Lisa
Mon Sep 22, 2008 6:00 AM

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Matt, I agree that bedwetting alone doesn't equal child molestation. However, the original letter also mentioned that the child has become noticeably withdrawn and somber since the boyfriend moved in. Before that his mother said he was lively and active. Granted, that still may not automatically mean molestation. At the same time you can't possibly ignore a child's personality and bladder control changing so dramatically in such a short period of time. Something is clearly wrong, and it needs to be looked into by a therapist or social worker; IMMEDIATELY.

Comment: #5
Posted by: Jon
Wed Sep 24, 2008 9:24 PM

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Ethnically Speaking by Larry Meeks

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Ethnically Speaking, September 20

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