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Responding to Poor Judgment
Dear Margo: This past year has been amazing for me. I successfully passed my first semester in college with a 4.0 while juggling friends and a job. I have a very goal-oriented boyfriend who is compassionate to boot! We have a lot in common and …Read more.
If It's Something Dire, You Will Know About It
Dear Margo: My husband is an only child in his late 30s. My father-in-law is terribly selfish. We live several states away, and because he's the only blood relative left, my spouse does his best to keep in touch with his father. It is rarely …Read more.
What's Up with That?
Dear Margo: I really don't know what to do about my mother. It's as though she's made a career out of not listening to what I say ... or she's dedicated herself to doing the opposite. Right after I told her I was going on a diet and staying away …Read more.
Guess What: Not Everyone Is Kind
Dear Margo: My husband, our children and I recently moved to a new town. Through the children, really, I've met a group of women. They apparently are longtime friends, and one of them invited me to their Wednesday mothers group for lunch. I have to …Read more.
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When the Time Comes To Talk TurkeyDear Margo: I am a female working in a male-dominated environment. I am happily married, with several male friends. Recently my supervisor was switched out, and I am now working for a female supervisor. Normally, I would be ecstatic, but a lot of my male friends (more than five) are confessing liaisons with this woman. I am not the type to gossip, so I haven't told any of them how many other men she is sleeping with. The woman is married — though obviously not happily. My problem is that she knows I am friends with a lot of these men, so she's aware of the fact that I know she has been sleeping with most of them. Now I get the ridiculous jobs, and she is attempting to poison my friendships. I have pretty much had enough. I don't like getting involved in stuff like this, but it's starting to affect my drama-free life. If I go to her supervisor, she will be demoted and will receive a much lower paycheck or maybe lose her job. I don't want to be responsible for that. I'm just wondering whether you have a solution for this strange problem. Any ideas would be much appreciated. — Not a Catty Female in the Military Dear Not: I would give this human welcome wagon a choice. Over coffee, I would tell her in a non-confrontational way that you know that she knows that you know. Then let her choose: Either she stops with the ridiculous assignments and trying to louse up your friendships, or you file a complaint that will not have a good outcome for her. Here's my prediction: She will shape up. If she does not, you will at least have offered her the choice. — Margo, straightforwardly Do Not Hand Over Your Handy Husband Dear Margo: Two years ago, a new couple moved in next door.
My husband started doing little jobs for "Suzy," feeling bad that she is married to this lazy do-nothing. We are now at the point where my husband spends half his weekend doing things for Suzy. Last weekend, he fixed her car, worked on her well and built a stoop for a side door. Now when Suzy comes over, she always has a huge smile for my husband first, then me. I told him last night that I'm getting a bad vibe about this friendship and am no longer interested in being friends because of all her requests. Am I being petty? — Living Next To Lazy Dear Liv: Not only do I not think you're being petty, I am starting to wonder what other things he might be doing for Suzy. There is quite a history for this in the annals of neighbor ladies and handy husbands. Even assuming there is no hanky-panky, this woman is far too presumptuous in piling on the requests, and your husband apparently doesn't know how to say no. I suggest you tell Mr. Fix-It that with only weekends at home, you are not willing to share them with the babe next door, or anyone. At the very least, Suzy is taking advantage and your husband is becoming addicted to her smiles. Tell him, in the name of peace and harmony at home, that you are asking him to knock it off and to tell Suzy to hire a handyman. — Margo, assuredly *** Dear Margo is written by Margo Howard, Ann Landers' daughter. All letters must be sent via e-mail to dearmargo@creators.com. Due to a high volume of e-mail, not all letters will be answered. COPYRIGHT 2009 MARGO HOWARD DISTRIBUTED BY CREATORS.COM
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