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When Dad/Gramps Just Ain't Interested
Dear Margo: By his choice, my father-in-law, "Herman," has had little to do with my wonderful family. He is a negative, toxic individual whom I don't trust given his manipulative and abusive behavior. When his wife finally moved out some …Read more.
When You Think You've Heard Everything ... You Haven't
Dear Margo: I have a doozy for you. My first cousin, "Lily," is a living, breathing waste of space. This girl had her first child at 15, her second at 17. Subsequently, she's had two more. When her first child was 4 months old, Lily's …Read more.
Beyond Tasteless, Not To Mention Tacky
Dear Margo: Can you give me some guidance regarding how to respond to a strange request? A friend we see occasionally got engaged six months ago. He's quite the social butterfly and has a ton of acquaintances. A couple of months ago, his fiancee …Read more.
Marrying a Guy in the Mormon Closet. Oy.
Dear Margo: My wife's 30-year-old daughter is quite immature emotionally and sexually. She has never had a boyfriend. Her father's family is Jewish, but she converted to Mormonism at 18. She has a close friend who is gay, also a Mormon, so he cannot …Read more.
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I Hear Ya Knockin', but You Can't Come InDear Margo: I need help with a sensitive issue. In the area where I live we get a lot of Jehovah's Witnesses who knock on our doors early on Saturday mornings. Not only do I enjoy sleeping in on my Saturdays, I do not believe what Jehovah's Witnesses believe. I also believe that religion is a personal choice that should be respected by everyone else, whether they believe the same or not. I have politely told them I have my own religion, which prompts a "debate." I have even been told, flat-out, that I am wrong! Once, I left a note on my door asking not to be disturbed, but that did not work. Ignoring the doorbell does not work, either. I really do not want to be rude, but I don't know what to say anymore to get them to leave me alone. What can I do to reclaim my Saturdays from these people? I hope you print this. I have never seen you broach this subject before. — Feeling Assaulted Dear Feel: I don't think I have written about this before ... but I've answered my door a few times and had the same problem you have had. I was going to suggest leaving a note on your door, but you say that doesn't work. I am not sure why ignoring the doorbell is not successful; with no answer, they have no choice but to move on. Because you say you like to sleep late on Saturday mornings, sleep with earplugs Friday night so the bell does not wake you. You might try another note that says "No one is home until noon. We work the night shift." Should you answer the door — when you're awake — and someone launches into the spiel, I think you have earned the right to simply close the door. I have never been able to figure out why this particular band of missionaries is so tone-deaf to people saying they are not interested. — Margo, sympathetically When You're Mad on Another's Behalf Dear Margo: I have a real doozy for you and no idea what to do. Fast-forward to today: My brother and Jennifer have decided to stay together and work on their marriage. I love my brother and want to be supportive, but I can't get over my anger toward this woman. She's slowly making appearances at family gatherings, dinners, etc, and I know I'm going to have to see her some time (although I've been able to avoid it so far). Others in the family tell me I should "suck it up," "put on a happy face," "forgive and forget." Doing those things, however, would make me feel like I am betraying my brother. I know when I finally do see her she's going to act like nothing happened and approach me with a hug. It makes me sick to think of even being nice to this woman, let alone giving her a hug. How can I move forward and also feel like I'm standing up for my brother? — Feeling None Too Forgiving Dear Feel: It's not your marriage, hon. If you really want to be there for your brother, you will go along with his decision for his family's future. (And there's always the chance this babe may still wander off the reservation.) I understand your anger toward and lack of respect for this woman, but if your brother can forgive her, you should try. You were not the wronged party. And, of course, you are entitled to your opinions. Enough said. — Margo, encouragingly *** Dear Margo is written by Margo Howard, Ann Landers' daughter. All letters must be sent via e-mail to dearmargo@creators.com. Due to a high volume of e-mail, not all letters will be answered. COPYRIGHT 2009 MARGO HOWARD DISTRIBUTED BY CREATORS SYNDICATE, INC.
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