Recently
Dreams of "What If?"
Dear Margo: I'm a 20-something woman engaged to the best man I've ever known. I am beyond ecstatic to be getting married. My problem has nothing to do with him and everything to do with a guy who was one of my best friends in college. This guy and I …Read more.
Afraid of Little Girls
Dear Margo: Between the ages of 6 and 10, I was severely bullied, but I was given the impression by grownups that such behavior was perfectly normal for children and I shouldn't be so sensitive. (I now realize they probably did not pay attention to …Read more.
Every Problem Does Not Have a Solution
Dear Margo: Many years ago, I got a call informing me that my son was arrested and being held on $1 million bail. That was when I first learned that he is a pedophile.
He has just completed his 20-year prison sentence, and during that time I learned …Read more.
When You Live on a One-Way Street
Dear Margo: My patience has run out with the three living members of my family. My father, his mother and my brother have gone through periods of not talking to each other or to me. My brother wants nothing to do with my father or our grandmother, …Read more.
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A 3-Year-Old Hellion?Dear Margo: I have a good friend whose 3-year-old is a complete terror. The child has no boundaries and has never been disciplined in her life. When my friend and her family visit my home, this little girl is constantly jumping on my furniture, throwing DVDs and torturing my animals. The other day I caught her choking my dog to the point where he almost passed out. My friend ignores this behavior and acts like it's no big deal. When I take objects away or put my animals outside, the child either throws a tantrum or deliberately waits until I turn my back to resume the bad behavior. It is getting to the point where I can't hang out with this friend anymore. The last few times we've gone out in public with this family, their daughter has hit other children, thrown a tantrum or attempted to take off her clothes and run around naked. Her parents do absolutely nothing. The worst part is that my friend is completely clueless. She told me recently that she wants to sign her daughter up for flute lessons and possibly enroll her in acting classes. Many of our other friends have stopped seeing this family because of this kid. How can I discuss this problem with my friend without offending her? I have a 1-year-old with whom I am very strict. I fear that if I approach her, the response will be that I just don't understand because I don't have a 3-year-old, or that I punish my child too harshly. Honestly, I don't want to tell my friend how to raise her child; I just want this kid to learn to respect other people and their things. — About To Lose a Good Friend Dear Ab: People are tetchy about criticism of their children, so don't expect your friend to welcome what you have to say. I would encourage you, though, to tell her that the acting out of this child is a sign of psychological disturbance and you highly recommend seeing a child specialist.
Where Is Your Boyfriend? He's in the Joint Dear Margo: I am a 20-something going for my master's degree. I have been fortunate enough to have met a man who is caring and wonderful. He knows me as well as anyone does, but here's the problem: He is incarcerated, and the friends and family I have told are horrified. I have not told my mother yet because I know she will be upset. No one seems to be supportive of this relationship, and I don't know how to tell people that I know this is my destiny. How can I tell them that I am confident in my choice and that I am happy? — Struggling Dear Strug: Well, I suppose you could say you are confident in your choice and that you are happy. I hope you understand that your friends and family have your best interests at heart, and a guy in jail may not sound to them like a real catch. What you don't say is what this man is in prison for and how long he will be there. I hope you are aware of the rather well-known fact that prisoners famously con people "on the outside" to wait for them, send money, etc. I think whether or not you knew this chap before he did what he did and went to the clink is crucial. It sounds to me as though your mind is made up, but you would do well to give it a think, as the Brits say. — Margo, pensively *** Dear Margo is written by Margo Howard, Ann Landers' daughter. All letters must be sent via e-mail to dearmargo@creators.com. Due to a high volume of e-mail, not all letters will be answered. COPYRIGHT 2009 MARGO HOWARD DISTRIBUTED BY CREATORS SYNDICATE, INC.
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