Unappreciated Daughter Seeks Peace Dear Annie: My parents own a good amount of land in their native country. When I was growing up, they paid for my tuition but were not very supportive emotionally. I sponsored them to come to the U.S., and because they didn't speak English (and …Read more. Informal Invites Dear Annie: I am a 27-year-old woman and have been verbally invited to a few weddings this year. For one, we were told to "save the date" a year in advance. I never received an actual invitation and their wedding was last weekend. The pictures are …Read more. Hiding at Home Dear Annie: My husband, "Ben," and I each lost a spouse and then found each other. We live in the same house with one of his daughters and a granddaughter. Ben is quite attached to this house. The two daughters are the owners now, but their father …Read more. Like Father, Like Sons Dear Annie: My heart is breaking for my sister. She has been married to the same man for more than 30 years and he has never been kind or respectful toward her. They have two married sons and a grandchild with health problems. My sister loves that …Read more.more articles
What's Behind Constant Accusations of Cheating?
Dear Annie: My husband and I have been together for five years. For the most part, we have a great relationship. The problem is, my husband is seven years older and had a few bad relationships before we got together. Because of this, he is always telling me I am a cheater and cannot be trusted.
Annie, I haven't done a single thing in my past or present to make him feel this way. It is a constant fight between us. I have suggested that maybe we should get counseling so we can work on this, but he hasn't been willing. Is there anything else I can do to make this annoying part of our relationship go away? — Irritated Wife
Dear Irritated: A person who constantly accuses the spouse of cheating when there is no cause is either cheating himself or too insecure to function in a healthy marriage. It is no way to live. First ask him to see his doctor and find out whether there is a medical reason for his behavior. Then stop "suggesting" and insist that your husband go with you for counseling. If he refuses, go on your own to decide whether this is something you can tolerate or alleviate.
Dear Annie: Why do stores think that having sales associates accost you in every aisle will make you enjoy shopping? A simple "Hello, how may I help you?" is all we need. Following us around and asking all sorts of questions is annoying. Knowing this will happen every time I enter the store makes me want to shop elsewhere.
People like to be acknowledged. They do not like to be hounded. If I want to wander around and look, I don't enjoy being bombarded by five salespeople asking me the same stuff over and over. A customer who wants help will ask for it. Otherwise, please leave us alone. Businesses should train their employees to treat people as valued customers, not idiots. — Toledo
Dear Toledo: You make a valid argument, but we have to say, for every person who doesn't want to be accosted, there are 10 who wish they could find a salesperson altogether.
Dear Annie: Not long ago, you printed a letter from "Too Clean, Too Fearful," a woman with anxiety about highway travel. She did not want counseling. You suggested relaxation techniques but didn't specifically mention Tai Chi or Qigong classes, which are available at many community centers, fitness clubs, YMCAs and senior centers.
I teach both Tai Chi and Qigong and have been practicing for more than 24 years. It was part of my personal "quit smoking" program in 1988. Tai Chi is "relaxation in motion." It is a moving meditation that teaches one how to relax in action. It is the only exercise I know that does this. Qigong is a cousin of Tai Chi.
These exercises can be done in private or in a park, alone or with a friend. You can share the activity with your spouse to learn how to relax together. They can be learned while seated for those who have difficulty standing. They can be enjoyed for a lifetime and help develop the mind, along with better balance and coordination. Tai Chi and Qigong are dynamic, fun and relaxing, and yes, they relieve anxiety. — Caroline
Dear Caroline: Thanks for the additional suggestions. We hope our interested readers will check out these activities.
Dear Readers: Today is Flag Day and the 34th Annual Pause for the Pledge of Allegiance at 7 p.m. (Eastern time). For more information, log on to americanflagfoundation.org.
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