Forever Second Fiddle Dear Annie: I have been in a relationship with "Ted" for the past eight years. We each have adult children from previous marriages. Ted has always put his daughters ahead of me and our relationship. When they were younger, I completely understood, …Read more. Anonymous Confession Dear Annie: My wife and I have been married for 30 years. Before we met, I coerced a woman into having sex. I did not use physical force, but she did not give consent. By today's standards, this was, I think, a clear case of date rape. I have never …Read more. Put Your Money Where Your Heart Is Dear Annie: I am an 83-year-old widow in good health. My daughter lives about two hours away. She is 50 and well educated and has been in a long-term relationship with an older retired man. She does a lot of care-giving for him and his family …Read more. Giving Away the (Art) Barn Dear Annie: My husband graduated from a very prestigious art college. Early in his career, he gave away some paintings to close friends and family members. Recently, he did a beautiful portrait for a family member who insisted on paying my husband. …Read more.more articles
I Spy Transcripts of My Wife's Infidelities
Dear Annie: My wife and I have been married for 20 years. I was laid off recently for the second time. While reviewing our finances, I noticed that our cellphone usage had substantially increased. I asked my wife about it, and she explained that she was catching up with friends.
I normally do not look at her phone, but I decided to see who she was yakking with. It turns out she was calling and texting a former male co-worker. I then found a naked photo of the man on her phone. She tried to pass it off as a joke and then said he'd been drinking when he sent it. Additional investigation led me to discover there were plenty of late-night texts and calls, and that she was also sending intimate photos of herself to him.
I feel betrayed and cheated on. We have talked and are working through this situation. I want to ask my cellphone provider for transcripts of their texts just to see if there is more to the situation than she is admitting. Do you think this is a wise choice? — Feeling Cheated On
Dear Cheated On: No. If you find nothing, you still have to deal with the problem at hand. And if you discover more pictures or evidence of an affair, you will feel worse, and those words and images will stick in your head for a long time. Your wife has betrayed your trust, whether or not she slept with the guy. Please get counseling. A third party can help you find the best way to get past this.
Dear Annie: I once invited my 60-year-old next-door neighbor to swim in our pool. She then informed me that she would come over daily after dinner and didn't plan to phone first. As she put it, "It's not convenient to call every day."
I tried to tell her politely that the pool is visible from our living room and it is not appropriate for her to use it without our knowledge. We are concerned with our privacy and her safety, not to mention our liability should anything happen to her.
I thought it was common sense and established social decorum that one should not swim in a neighbor's pool without an invitation. Am I correct? How do I mend our relationship? — Confused Pool Owner
Dear Confused: You are correct. Your neighbor doesn't understand boundaries and has limited social acumen. She also has a short fuse. We don't know why you want to mend fences with someone who apparently only values you for your swim facilities. If you apologize for upsetting her, she will expect to have complete access to the pool again. The best you can do is smile and say hello when you see her, and hope for the best.
Dear Annie: I am writing in response to the letters about school lunches. I have been in the student nutrition profession for more than 20 years. Our school offers a wide variety of fresh fruits and vegetables every day, along with salads and meatless options. All of our pasta, rice, bread and pizza crusts are whole grain. We no longer have fries every day, and nothing is deep-fried. We even offer a grilled chicken sandwich.
People don't realize all the regulations we must follow to comply with the National School Lunch Program. Many districts don't have the money for fresh produce. We encourage the students to eat more fruits and vegetables, but if they don't have them at home, it is a struggle. We need the help of parents. The public rarely hears the positive side. Please help us out. — Proud "Lunch Lady" from Minnesota
Dear Minnesota: Consider it done. It's good to know that some schools are doing their best to provide healthy choices for our kids.
Annie's Mailbox is written by Kathy Mitchell and Marcy Sugar, longtime editors of the Ann Landers column. Please e-mail your questions to firstname.lastname@example.org, or write to: Annie's Mailbox, c/o Creators Syndicate, 5777 W. Century Blvd., Ste. 700, Los Angeles, CA 90045. To find out more about Annie's Mailbox and read features by other Creators Syndicate writers and cartoonists, visit the Creators Syndicate Web page at www.creators.com.
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